Tawa Baptist

The Dream

Scripture: Genesis 37:1-11

Video Link: https://youtu.be/f4wWy7Cf3JI

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • God’s election
  • God’s revelation
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

In the early 1970’s the musical production, Joseph and the amazing technicolour dream coat was launched on stage. The story line is based on the account of Joseph in the book of Genesis. 

It must be one of the most popular musicals of all time. Something like 20,000 amateur productions have been performed throughout the past 50 odd years.

Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber took some liberties with their version, but we won’t hold that against them. It’s good to see a Bible story celebrated.

Today we begin a new sermon series based, not on the Joseph musical, but on the original story of Joseph in Genesis. From Genesis 37, verses 1-11, we read…

Jacob lived in the land where his father had stayed, the land of Canaan. 2 This is the account of Jacob’s family line. Joseph, a young man of seventeen, was tending the flocks with his brothers, the sons of Bilhah and the sons of Zilpah, his father’s wives, and he brought their father a bad report about them. 3 Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons, because he had been born to him in his old age; and he made an ornate robe for him. 4 When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him. 5 Joseph had a dream, and when he told it to his brothers, they hated him all the more. 6 He said to them, “Listen to this dream I had: 7 We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it.” 8 His brothers said to him, “Do you intend to reign over us? Will you actually rule us?” And they hated him all the more because of his dream and what he had said. 9 Then he had another dream, and he told it to his brothers. “Listen,” he said, “I had another dream, and this time the sun and moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me.” 10 When he told his father as well as his brothers, his father rebuked him and said, “What is this dream you had? Will your mother and I and your brothers actually come and bow down to the ground before you?” 11 His brothers were jealous of him, but his father kept the matter in mind.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

If you didn’t know anything about the Joseph story, and all you had to go on was the title, Joseph and the amazing technicolour dream coat, then you might think it was a story about a dude called Joseph who had a coat which gave him special powers.

But really, the Joseph story is not about a coat and it’s not primarily about Joseph either. At its core, the Joseph story is about God and his hidden purpose.

Today’s reading highlights the twin themes of God’s election and God’s revelation. Sadly, God’s revelation and election are misunderstood by his people.

God’s election:

God’s election is a technical theological term that refers to God choosing a particular person or group of people for a particular purpose. To be elected by God is to be chosen for a purpose.

If you think of God as a carpenter and human beings as the carpenter’s tools, then God’s election is like the Lord selecting a particular tool to do a specific job. Maybe, at one time, he will select a hammer. But he won’t always select a hammer. Other times he will select a measuring tape or a scribe or a saw, depending on what he wants to achieve.

God makes people differently, each to serve a different purpose. Being chosen (or elected) by God does not make you better or more important than other people. Nor does it make your life easier. But it does give your life eternal meaning.

Earlier in the book of Genesis, God elected Abraham to serve the divine purpose of blessing the nations of the world. As part of God’s election of Abraham, the Lord made certain promises. Those promises, together with God’s election, were passed on to Isaac and then to Jacob. 

God changed Jacob’s name to Israel, and Jacob became the founding father of the nation of Israel. Israel being God’s elect, his chosen people and the inheritors of God’s promises to Abraham.

Put very simply, God elected the people of Israel for the purpose of blessing the world. 

Jacob had four wives, twelve sons and one daughter. (He must have been exhausted.) These days we would call this arrangement a blended family. The twelve sons became the twelve tribes of Israel.

It would be fair to say, Jacob’s family dynamic was not that healthy. In fact, it was dysfunctional. There were rivalries and jealousies, secrets and lies, violence and cover ups. There wasn’t much love to go around.

God’s election is inscrutable. It is beyond our comprehension. If you are selecting someone for the All Blacks or the White Ferns, you pick the best of the best. More than selecting raw talent though, you pick people who work well together as a team.

But, from our limited human vantage point, it appears God’s election does not work like that. God’s election is not based on our virtue or competence.

Jacob’s family were not very good at being a family. They did not work well together as a team. And some of them lacked a moral compass. It is a testament to God’s wisdom and grace that he was able to use such a dysfunctional family to bless the world in a significant way.     

Joseph was Jacob’s second youngest son and he was Jacob’s favourite. Jacob gave Joseph a special coat to wear. We don’t know whether the coat was one of many colours but it stood out in some way, perhaps a bit like a korowai in that it was a symbol or mantle of leadership.

The coat sent a clear message to the whole family that Joseph was Jacob’s favourite to take over one day. The brothers hated him for it. Being elected the favourite tends to isolate you.

I’m reading Martin Seligman’s book, Flourish, at the moment. It’s about positive psychology and wellbeing. In his book, Martin writes about the Losada ratio.

The idea is that for organisations and teams to function well, people need to be saying at least three positive statements for each negative statement. Three to one is the minimum.

A ratio of five positive statements to one critical statement is better though.

For example, if you want a strong and loving marriage, you need to be saying five good things to your husband or wife, for every critical comment.  

That being said, critical comments still have their place. If there is no critique, then the positive statements tend to lose their credibility. The point is, for human flourishing we need to aim for a ratio of five positive statements for each negative statement.        

Three times in today’s passage we read how Joseph’s brothers hated him and they could not speak a kind word to him.

Joseph did not get a Losada ratio of five to one. He didn’t even get a three to one ratio. The negative comments he received outweighed the positive. Which was like pouring weed killer on the relationship.

Joseph’s mother, Rachel, died when Joseph was around six or seven, so Joseph was pretty much on his own in the family, except for his father and his younger brother, Benjamin. Life within the family was not easy for Joseph.

Which brings us to a sobering point. Election, being chosen or set apart for a special purpose, is not easy. Election has a way of putting a target on your back. 

Some might say that Joseph did not help himself in this regard. In verse 2, for example, we read how Joseph was working with four of his brothers and brought a bad report about them to his father.

Some commentators criticize Joseph for doing this, saying it shows he was a spoilt brat, a tattletale and unwise. But the text makes no criticism of Joseph.

Joseph’s honest report to his father is more likely a sign of his integrity. Joseph was not like his brothers. He was not inclined to deceit. He did not hide things. Joseph was an open book.

In talking about election, we must also talk about Jesus. As we will see throughout this series, Joseph points to Christ in many ways.

Joseph is like Jesus in that God used Joseph to save many people.

When it comes to God’s election, Jesus does more than Joseph though.

Jesus opens the door of God’s election to all people.

You see, God has elected one person, Jesus, to be the Messiah, the Saviour of the world. Therefore, anyone who accepts Jesus and is found in Christ becomes part of the elect people of God.

As I mentioned before, becoming part of the elect people of God does not make you better than others. Nor will it make your life easier (in this world). Being part of the elect people of God comes with the responsibility of serving God’s purpose. Obeying his will.

Some believe that God elects certain people for salvation and others for damnation. And they call that predestination. I don’t believe that. I believe God gives everyone a fair go.

It’s more like God is saying to humanity, if you want to become part of my elect people, then Jesus is the pathway. Jesus is the doorway for entry. Accept Jesus and you are in, you are one of the elect. Jesus is way, the truth and the life.

Now, at the same time, God is free. Free to help certain people onto the right path. Free to help certain people to receive Jesus. But God’s action in doing that does not exclude anyone else from coming to Christ.

You might wonder, ‘So what about those who are not in Christ? What about those who don’t accept Jesus? Perhaps because they did not have much opportunity. What happens to them?’

Well, Jesus taught that God treats everyone with justice and fairness. That means, at the end of the day when we face judgment, the least we can expect from God is fairness.

The measure you use for others is the measure God will use for you.

If you forgive others, God will forgive you.

Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy.

These are the sorts of things the Lord said. Therefore, it is in our interests to be kind, forgiving, and generous. Of course, if someone is living their life like this, then they have accepted the way of Christ, even if they are not aware of it.

God’s revelation:

God’s election goes hand in hand with God’s revelation. Revelation is another technical theological term that basically refers to the way God reveals himself and his plan. Revelation is God’s way of communicating with us, in other words.

God can communicate in all sorts of ways. One way is through dreams.

In the ancient near east, people were inclined to believe that a dream was a message from the gods, like an omen or a prediction of things to come.

Let me be clear. Just because Joseph had a dream that came true, it does not automatically follow that every dream you have is a message from God about the future.

Current thinking tells us that dreams are our mind’s way of processing what has already happened to us, in the past, especially the recent past. Our dreams help to untangle knots in our thinking and feeling. Dreams are sort of like anti-virus software on a computer, identifying bad code and cleaning it up.

Or, to put it another way, dreams are the unconscious mind communicating with the conscious mind. For example, if we repress an emotion during the day,

that emotion is likely to pop up in a dream at night. Maybe a dream that gives us a good feeling, or a nightmare, depending on the emotion.

The other thing to understand is that dreams use symbols or picture language to communicate. It does no good to try and interpret a dream literally. You have to translate the images in your dream, according to what those images mean for you personally, or the dream won’t make sense.

What I’m saying here is most dreams are about your personal past, not the future. And most dreams are a message from your unconscious mind, not a message from God.

There are exceptions to this rule, however. There may be times when God plants an idea in your mind while you sleep. Sort of like the movie Inception.

With the benefit of hindsight, it appears God revealed something of his purpose for Joseph and Jacob’s family through the dreams in Genesis 37.

Joseph had two dreams which he shared with his brothers. In the first dream the brothers’ sheaves of grain bowed down to Joseph’s and in the second dream the sun, moon and eleven stars bowed down to Joseph.

Interestingly, Joseph does not offer an interpretation of his own dreams. He simply shares the dreams and lets his family draw their own conclusions. Sometimes we are too close to our dreams and we need the perspective of someone who knows us well, someone we can trust, to help us interpret our dreams.

Unfortunately, Joseph’s brothers did not really know him all that well and they were not trustworthy caretakers of his innermost thoughts. The brothers respond defensively, saying, “Do you intend to reign over us? Will you actually rule us?”   

Joseph’s brothers question the revelation Joseph has received. They cannot accept it. Joseph’s dreams are dangerous. They threaten the status quo. They are an omen of upset in which the natural order of things is turned on its head. The young are supposed to serve the older, not the other way round.    

Sadly, Jacob’s family do not properly understand Joseph’s dreams or God’s purpose. In God’s scheme, the greatest is the servant of all and the one in charge does not lord it over the others. This is what Jesus taught us.

What Jacob’s family do not yet realise is that Joseph has been elected by God to save the family, more than rule over them. Had Joseph’s family understood the suffering Joseph would go through to achieve God’s purpose, they might have had a different response.

Although Jacob echoes his sons in publicly rebuking Joseph, privately the old man kept the matter in mind. We are reminded of Mary who, at the wonderful revelations surrounding Jesus’ birth, pondered these things in her heart.   

Jacob knew enough of God’s ways to not rule out the possibility that Joseph’s dreams would come true. Likewise, we should not be too quick to judge.

We should never say, ‘God cannot use me. I have nothing to offer’. Nor should we say, ‘God cannot work through this person or that situation’. God is free to work out his purpose however he wants. We need to let God be God.

God’s inscrutable election means we live with hope and possibility. We do well to ponder these wonders in our heart.  

Conclusion:

Just as God elects his Son Jesus to save the world, so too God reveals himself to the world most clearly through Jesus.

Jesus is the perfect image of God. Jesus shows us what it looks like to be human, as God intended. If we want to know God’s purpose, our best bet is to look to Jesus who embodies the truth and grace of God.

Let me conclude our message now with another way in which Joseph points to Jesus. The dreams Joseph had were similar to the dream God has given us. Similar, but not identical.  

Joseph dreamed that his family would bow down to him. Our God inspired dream is not that people would bow down to us, but rather that at the name of Jesus every knee shall bow… and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. 

When that happens, God’s kingdom will be realized in its fullness and we will have heaven on earth. No more injustice, no more war, no more loneliness, no more sickness or pain. That is the dream.

May the Lord strengthen our hope as we wait for the day of Jesus’ return. Amen.

Questions for discussion or reflection:

What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?

  • What do we mean by ‘God’s election’? Why does God elect people?
  • How do we become part of God’s elect people? What are the implications of being part of God’s elect people?
  • What ratio of positive to negative comments do you use in your conversation with others? What ratio of positive to negative comments do you receive? Does anything need to change for your relationships to flourish?
  • What do we mean by ‘God’s revelation’? What are some of the ways God communicates with you?
  • Have you ever had a dream you sensed was from God? If so, how did you know God was speaking to you in the dream?  
  • Discuss / reflect on the twin concepts of God’s election and revelation as they relate to Jesus? How does Jesus fulfil God’s election and revelation?
Tawa Baptist

Mind That Child

Scripture: Proverbs 22:6 and Proverbs 13:24 and Matthew 18:3-6

Video Link: https://youtu.be/qaaKStX-yjU

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • Train your child
  • Protect your child
  • Trust your child to God
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

When I was five, and about to start school, my parents taught me how to tie my shoelaces. For some reason the method I learned was different from the way most other people tied their shoes.

There’s nothing wrong with the method I learned. It has worked for me as long as I’ve been wearing shoes, but I still get the occasional comment from people along the lines of, ‘Gee you tie your shoes in a weird way.’

Some years ago, I asked Robyn to show me the normal way of tying shoes, but it was too late. I had been tying my laces my own unique way for so long I couldn’t unlearn it. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks I suppose.  

Earlier in the service we had a graduation ceremony for the children moving up a level in Kids’ Church.

With this in view it seems appropriate to conclude our series in the book of Proverbs by focusing on chapter 22, verse 6, which reads…

Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not turn from it.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us. 

Train your child:

Although this translation uses the masculine pronoun ‘he’, the principle is the same whatever the gender of the child. Train a child in the way he or she should go and when they are old, they will not turn from it.

Now, when we read this verse we might think, ‘Oh, that’s straight forward enough. If I teach my kids the right way to do something, then that will become the pattern or default setting for their life. They will get in the habit of doing things the way they were taught and find it very difficult to change’. Sort of like me and my laces. 

There’s nothing wrong with reading the verse in this way, but really there’s more to it than that. Something is lost in the English version.

The original Hebrew word translated as train, doesn’t just mean teach or instruct. It can also be translated as dedicate. As in dedicating a temple to the worship of God. Or dedicating a house to use as your family home.

When you dedicate something, you set it aside for a special purpose, you bless it. In the context of the book of Proverbs, parents are to dedicate or train their children to live a life of wisdom.     

When you walk into the train station in Wellington city you notice several different tracks. At first glance all the tracks appear to be headed in the same direction. But they are not of course.

Each track is dedicated or trained to a specific location. If you want to end up in Tawa or Porirua, then you must be careful not to get on the Hutt line. You need to get on the Waikanae line.

Training your child is like putting them on the right track. That is, the pathway that is dedicated to wisdom and leads to life.   

As I said before, earlier in our service of worship today we held a graduation ceremony for the children moving up a level in Kids’ Church. It is important to mark transitions and special occasions with a formal ceremony like this because it validates the child’s journey. It says, you are on the right track, keep going.

The graduation ceremony is a tangible, visible way of dedicating our children to a particular path of wisdom. It’s a way of publicly acknowledging the importance of learning about Jesus and how to relate with God through Christ. 

In Proverbs 22, verse 6, where it says, train a child in the way he (or she) should go…’ that literally translates, ‘train him according to his way…’

In other words, the way is specific to the child. There is no universal, cookie cutter, one size fits all approach for training a child to be wise. Each child is different and needs a different approach suited to the way they are wired.      

This means parents and grandparents need to seek to understand their children and respect each child’s individual personality, gifts and way of learning. 

When one of our daughters was still at school and wondering what she might do for a job, we took her along to see a careers advisor. The careers advisor suggested a job in agriculture.

I looked at Robyn in disbelief. I couldn’t decide whether the careers advisor was trying to be funny or was just really bad at her job.

There is nothing wrong with being a farmer, it’s good honest productive work. Likewise, there is nothing wrong with women being farmers.

But it was plain to me that putting up fences and shearing sheep was not going to come naturally to our daughter. Sending her to Lincoln to get a diploma in agriculture and work on a farm would have been the wrong path for her.

The point here is that when training children in the way they should go, parents need to go with the grain of their child. If your child is not good with animals but is good with children, then don’t encourage them into farming. Help them explore options that involve working with kids.

Likewise, if your child is not academic but is good with their hands, then don’t force them down the path of university. Help them find their way into a trade.

Of course, training a child in the way they should go is not limited to career advice. Training a child also has a moral aspect as well. We don’t just want our kids to be good at their jobs. We want them to become decent human beings who contribute positively to society.   

Character formation tends to be more caught than taught. Generally speaking, children often learn more from their parents’ example than anything their parents might say. Words are still important, but actions speak louder.

All my parents and grandparents had a strong work ethic. I learned how to work by being immersed in a family that worked all the time. We were always doing something productive. This was good up to a point, but we may have benefited from learning to take a Sabbath as well.

What rhythms and routines do you maintain as a family? Children pick up a great deal unconsciously from the regular daily and weekly patterns their parents set.

Some of you may be wondering about the discipline aspect of training children. Sometimes kids are delightful and a joy to be with. But they can also be really demanding and test our patience.

How do we teach children self-discipline, so they are capable of achieving worthwhile goals. How do we correct a child when they cross the line? What is an appropriate response to poor behaviour? 

Again, parents need to respond in ways that fit the child and the situation. Train him according to his (or her) way…

You may have heard the saying, behaviour is communication. Behaviour is like the tip of the iceberg; the part you can see above the water line. Behaviour is driven by what’s happening beneath the surface.

If your child is behaving in a way that does not meet your expectations, then you have to ask yourself, ‘What is my child telling me?’ ‘What are they trying to communicate by their behaviour? ‘What’s going on beneath the surface?’    

Maybe they are simply tired or hungry or sick, but they are not able to use their words, so they throw a tantrum. In that case, they don’t need to be punished. They need some food and a sleep.

Or maybe they are bored, in which case they might benefit from some responsibility, being given a household task which is a bit challenging without being overwhelming. Ideally something they can do with you.

Behaviour is communication. What is your child saying when they throw their toys or yell at you or pull their sister’s hair? Well, they might be telling you they are angry. Anger is the normal reaction to injustice. Kids like things to be fair.

Everyone wants things to be fair, but kids are especially tuned in to matters of justice, at least as it pertains to them. Unfortunately, the world we live in is not always fair, and so part of training a child means acknowledging the injustice and helping them find constructive ways to express their anger.

Your kids need you to be consistent and fair. Then they will learn to trust you and they will know where to turn when life gives them lemons.

Protect your child:

So, what about physical punishment? Is it okay to smack your kids? Afterall, doesn’t the Bible say, ‘Spare the rod and spoil the child’? Meaning, a decent hiding is good for a child.

Well, no, the Bible does not say that at all. Spare the rod and spoil the child is an old English proverb. Those words are not found in Scripture. 

What the Bible actually says, in Proverbs 13 verse 4, is this…

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline.

The rod in this proverb is a metaphor for discipline in the sense of training or correction. This is poetry, not to be taken literally. The emphasis is on loving your children and being careful in what you teach them and how you correct them. This is not a recommendation for hitting children.   

Literally hitting children is likely to teach them fear, anger and violence, more than anything else. Positive reinforcement and encouragement is a far more effective way of correcting children. Kids need to grow up around adults who have gentle hands, kind words and a positive, warm presence.

In the 23rd Psalm, David says of the Lord, …your rod and your staff they comfort me. Here the rod is associated with comfort, not punishment.  

The shepherd’s rod was like a club (a weapon) the shepherd used to fend off wild dogs and other predators that threatened the sheep. The shepherd did not hit the sheep with his rod. He protected the sheep with his rod.

Likewise, loving parents will not use the rod to hit their children. They will use the rod to protect their children from harm.

For example, loving parents will put safeguards in place to ensure their young children don’t have access to content on the TV or internet that would be disturbing to them. And, as their children get older, loving parents will teach them how to navigate the internet safely.

We might think of the rod as a metaphor for setting boundaries. Boundaries tend to make kids feel safe.  Loving parents will create healthy boundaries for their children. They will say ‘no’ to their kids when that is appropriate.

Of course, you don’t want the boundaries to be too tight or too strict. Kids need room to explore and learn and have fun. By the same token, it’s not helpful to let your kids run wild either. You set boundaries to fit the soul and temperament of the child.

Do you get what Proverbs 13 is saying? The rod is not used for hitting children. It is used for protecting children from those things which do harm.

Jesus was very strong on protecting children. Listen to what he says in Matthew 18, verse 6…

“If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”

Okay, we have unpacked the first part of Proverbs 22, verse 6. Train a child in the way he should go. This is about dedicating a child to the path of wisdom, or putting them on the right track, in other words. But the right track is not a generic, one size fits all. The right track is tailored to the needs of the child.

Understand and respect your child’s individuality. Train your child in the way that fits who they are. Remember, behaviour is communication. So called naughty behaviour might actually be a cry for help. Are you listening to what your child’s behaviour is saying?  

Trust your child to God:

What about the second part of that verse? Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not turn from it.

Hmm. The thing we need to remember here is that this is a proverb, not a promise. A proverb is a like a general rule or a principle. There will always be exceptions to the rule.

As a general rule, training a child in the way he should go will result in that child sticking to what they have learned throughout life, like the way I tie my shoelaces.

However, there will be times when even the best training does not stick and children walk a different path from the one their parents intended for them. So, we should not blame parents for the sins of their children. As adults we need to take responsibility for our own actions.

We also need to be aware of the historical and cultural differences. The Old Testament book of Proverbs was written maybe 2,500 to 3000 years ago at a time and place in history that is very different from our own.

In the world of the ancient near east, adulthood was marked by taking on responsibilities for your family and the neighbourhood. To be an adult was to look after your parents, your wider family and your community.

By contrast, in modern western culture, adulthood is defined by individuation, leaving home and becoming independent.

Another key difference between then and now is the number of influences people face. In the ancient near east, people did not have TV or the internet or social media. They were mainly influenced by their own family and the people they lived with in their community.

Also, parents and children worked and lived together much of the time. So, children were not exposed to as many alternatives as they are today. A young person back then might be more inclined to go along with what their parents taught them because they did not know anything else.

These days our children can literally access a world of different alternatives at the press of a button. Kids don’t spend as much time around their parents, which means parents don’t have nearly as much influence as they once did.        

The point I’m making here is that these days, when you train a child in the way he should go it does not necessarily follow that when he is old, he will not turn from it. Your kids might stick to what you taught them. But then again, they might pick and choose what bits to adopt and what bits to discard.

Robert Louis Stevenson, the author of stories like Treasure Island and Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, was born into a Christian home. Both of his parents were devout Presbyterians, and his grandfather was a Church of Scotland minister. Stevenson’s nurse was fervently religious too.

All of this is to say that, as a child, Robert Louis Stevenson had plenty of people training him in the way he should go. He knew about God and he knew his parents loved him, but this did not guarantee a life time of walking closely with Jesus.   

In 1873, at the age of 22, Robert Louis Stevenson no longer believed in God and had grown tired of pretending to be something he was not. His father was devastated to hear that his son was an atheist saying, ‘You have rendered my whole life a failure’. His mother was equally wounded.      

Parenting is one of the hardest things you can do. To learn that your child has rejected what you hold dear is difficult indeed. Sometimes there is nothing you can do but pray and trust your child to God’s grace.

Stevenson’s rejection of God and the church did not turn into a lifelong atheism though. About five years later, at the age of 27, Robert wrote to his father saying…

Christianity is, among other things, a very wise, noble and strange doctrine of life… I have a good heart and believe in myself and my fellow-men and the God who made us all… There is a fine text in the Bible to the effect ‘that all things work together for good for those who love the Lord’.

Robert Louis Stevenson returned to Christian faith in the second part of his life, but it wasn’t the same faith he had as a child. Nor was it exactly the same as his parents’ faith. Stevenson emerged from his time of spiritual disorientation with a new orientation.       

Churches are full of faithful people who do their best to encourage their kids to follow Jesus, only to have those same kids walk away from Christ and the church. Not that their kids are bad people. They often operate out of some very Christ-like values, perhaps without realising it. They just don’t embrace everything their parents tried to teach them.     

Life and faith are a journey with many unexpected twists and turns. As parents we have a responsibility to train our children and to protect our children. Ultimately though, we must trust our children to God. We are not responsible for the choices our adult children make.

Conclusion:

The other thing to remember here is that children have something very important to teach adults. As Jesus says in Matthew 18…

I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

Let us pray…

Loving Father, help us to train children in the way they should go. Help us to protect children and to trust our children to you. Help us also to learn from children. Through Jesus we pray. Amen. 

Questions for discussion or reflection:

What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?

  • Can you think of something you were taught when you were young that has stayed with you throughout your life? What was it? Has it served you well?
  • What does it mean to train your child in the way he or she should go? How might you do this?
  • What rhythms and routines do you maintain? How are these rhythms and routines shaping you and those around you? What would a child learn from your example?
  • Discuss / reflect on the statement, behaviour is communication. What does this mean? Can you think of examples from your own experience?
  • How do we teach children self-discipline? How do we correct a child when they cross the line? What is an appropriate response to poor behaviour?
  • How might we protect children? Why do children need boundaries?
  • What can we learn from children? (c.f. Jesus’ comments in Matthew 18)   
Tawa Baptist

Why the Gospel

Prepared by Mike Harvey

Good morning

For those of you who don’t know me, or who are new or new-sh to this church, you might guess I’m from Canada or the US.  Pretty good guess – California actually.  I moved to NZ 22 years ago to see the lovely sights in this country, well, one lovely sight whose name is Geraldine.  Being the smart man I was, I married Geraldine almost straight away, and we have been attending Tawa Baptist since 2003.

I grew up in a Christian home, and went to what I think was a pretty typical evangelical church in America.  I was a child of the 1970s & 80s — at the time, evangelical leaders and groups such as Campus Crusade were big on such jargon and ideas like being born again, the Four Spiritual Laws, and the Romans Road to Salvation.

There was a big emphasis on sharing the Gospel, or ‘the Good news’; and as a college and university student, I did a bit of that, knocking on doors once (frightening experience), and then after university I did missionary work for a while.   Later in life, I heard sermons that it’s not only your words, but it can be your deeds too, that attract people to the Gospel.  And the importance of prayer.  So that was nice, took the pressure off.  I didn’t feel I always had to be ‘out there’ talking to strangers.

But lately I’ve come to realise that in my life, I haven’t heard many sermons about WHY I should evangelise, or do good deeds, or pray.  Was it primarily to get people into Heaven?  Or was it primarily so they’d have better lives now, while they are still alive?  They would feel loved (?), for example, by the Divine, and so they’d feel more able to love others?  Which one of these was the primary reason?  Or were all of these good reasons in equal measure?  All of these goals were of course mentioned in some of the things I heard and read, but I don’t remember hearing or reading anyone saying, THIS is the main goal, and those other things are secondary, or no, THAT’s the main goal, and here are some by-products.

As a Christian singular, where am I trying to go?  Or maybe a better question – As Christians plural, as a church (Tawa Baptist and the wider church), where are WE trying to go?  What are we hoping to achieve?

I was listening to a podcast a couple months ago and Matthew W Bates was being interviewed.  He’s a professor of theology at a small university in Illinois and he’s written a handful of books.  His most recent book is called  Why the Gospel?  On the podcast he told a story about him talking to a room of pastors and he gave them this question:  “Why did God give us the Gospel?”

He said,  “There was a fairly stunned silence.  If I had asked What IS the gospel, I would have got some pretty good answers.  But the question WHY the gospel is one I think throws people off.”  When he has asked this to other groups, he does say after a while he gets answers such as “Well because we need forgiveness” or “Because God loves us”. 

Mr Bates went on to say this:  “But both of those miss the target, I think, by short circuiting what Scripture teaches us…, and misses the primary reason God gives us the gospel…and that is, because we need a King.”

Mr Bates later goes into what he means by that, and if you want to listen to the episode, I have a link to that podcast at end of my sermon notes.   But I want to use his idea of kingship to go in a different direction.  And that is: Why a king?  Why is THAT important – what human need does a king fill? 

As an American import living in NZ, I have had to become familiar with NZ’s connection to the British monarchy.  At first, I didn’t quite understand that relationship, and I suppose I still don’t fully get it.  Why keep that connection?  Indeed, why does the UK still have a queen, or a king?  When it’s only a ceremonial role?   What practical use does it have?

But then I watched the Queen’s and King’s Christmas messages over the years.  The Queen would often talk about peace and reconciliation, of community service, of faith and hope.   Last month, King Charles said we “must protect the Earth and our natural world as the one home which we all share”.

And then there was the movie ‘The King’s Speech” about King George VI. (A terrific movie by the way, recommended!)  The day Britain declared war on Germany, he said in a radio address:

“The task will be hard. There may be dark days ahead, and war can no longer be confined to the battlefield. But we can only do the right as we see the right, and reverently commit our cause to God.  If one and all we keep resolutely faithful to it, ready for whatever service or sacrifice it may demand, then, with God’s help, we shall prevail.”

So now I was starting to get it – what the point of a monarch was.  At their best, they can inspire us to do great things, or rally us in times of difficulty.  And in the movie, you saw all of Britain huddled around radios together as families or at a pub.   In the old clips of the Queen visiting NZ, we see throngs of people, all together as one as they welcomed her. 

At our best, this speaks to something about identity, doesn’t it?  A CORPORATE identity.  By joining together around a king or queen, we’re making a statement that we are part of a group, with a common purpose.  We are saying we want to be a PLACE of justice, freedom, and beauty, a place of joy, hope and love.

In other words, yes I agree with Mr Bates that we need a king, but it would be kind of strange for me as individual to have a king who is king of only me.  King implies there is a kingDOM, a group of people rather than just one person.  And to me, that’ a more exciting prospect, that I would be part of a kingDOM, to have a sense of belonging, of knowing who I am in the context of community.

First Sameul 8 tells us that 1000 years before Jesus, Israel wanted a king like the other nations had.  And if you’ll recall, God was pretty mad at them for asking that.  But it wasn’t because he was against the idea of kingship and kingdom;  it was because HE was supposed to be their king.

Israel was to be different from other nations – while they had human kings, Israel was to have a DIVINE king.  They were to have a UNIQUE identity, a unique corporate identity, a divine identity, which would be a model of peace and justice and fairness and joy and love to other nations, that other nations may be drawn to them and ultimately to God the King, so that all of humanity would experience the same glory.  After all, God had promised Abraham in Genesis 12 that all peoples on earth would be blessed through him.

But Israel wanted that human king – they gave themselves over to worldly powers.  This was sin with a Capital S.

I think it’s helpful to think of sin in two ways – Capital S versus small S sin.  Capital S sin is when we overvalue things of this world that are temporary, like $$, personal success, or comfort, and undervalue our relationship to God, undervalue our relationship to each other as God-image-bearing humans, and undervalue God’s Creation.  When we have Capital S sin in our lives, we’re much more likely to commit small s sins, such as greed, envy and hatred, and that’s what often happened with Israel, according to the Old Testament.

Time and again in the Old Testament, we see God trying to help Israel out of the trap of Sin and sins. He gave them laws to help them value their relationships with Him and each other, and he gave them prophets to warn them when they were going off on the wrong path.  Through his prophets, he also showed them his heart, how much he loved them. Listen to these words from the prophet Hosea – chapter 11:

1 When Israel was a child, I loved him,
    and out of Egypt I called my son.
2But the more they were called,
    the more they went away from me.

It was I who taught Ephraim to walk,  [Ephraim was one of the 12 tribes of Israel]
    taking them by the arms;
but they did not realize
    it was I who healed them.

Verse 4: To them I was like one who lifts
    a little child to the cheek,
    and I bent down to feed them.

Will they not return to Egypt because they refuse to repent?

Verse 7:  My people are determined to turn from me.
    Even though they call me God Most High,
    I will by no means exalt them.

Verse 8:  “How can I give you up, Ephraim?
    How can I hand you over, Israel?

My heart is changed within me;
    all my compassion is aroused

Verse 9:  I will not carry out my fierce anger,
    nor will I devastate Ephraim again.

Behold the heart of God!   Verse 4, he shows the tenderness of a parent.  But verse 7, he’s angry and pained at their rejection, and says he will not exalt them.  But then verse 8, he says his heart is changed and says he won’t carry out his fierce anger.  You see this internal anguish, the going back and forth between pain and compassion.  One would have hoped Israel, when listening to these words by Hosea, would have finally turned to God.

But in general, Israel wouldn’t budge; they would fall under the temptation of Capital S sin and, as a result, become so weak and powerless, burdened by a multitude of small s sins, they’d again fall victim to invasion and exile.  The pattern, the cycle, continued, even up to the time of Jesus, when they still found themselves under the power of someone else, this time the Romans.

But was Jesus now the King, the Messiah who would free Israel from this worldly power Rome?  Well, no and yes.  Jesus certainly didn’t live the life of a king.   But he did show his power over human and demonic forces, with healings and forgiveness.  He didn’t start a political revolution in the traditional sense, but he did show a revolutionary way of living where the law of God, the law of love would be followed, rather than the unjust laws of man –  but in the end Jesus, and so God himself, was rejected and killed.

History had been building to this moment.  God coming to earth through his Son was the ultimate illustration of God’s desire to reconcile mankind with Himself, and reconcile mankind with each other.  The cross was the ultimate incident of mankind’s rejection of God’s love.  And because of this, it was the ultimate incident of divine suffering, and so the ultimate expression of God’s love.

Sin, with a capital S, that is, mankind’s rejection of God, had seemed to have won.   But on the 3rd day Jesus rose, showing that Sin and death were conquered.   And by the way, not all of Israel had rejected Him.   Lifted in their spirits by the resurrection, 11 of his disciples, and then Paul, all 12 of them Israelites, and then small groups of followers, took up the mantle and spread the Gospel. They wrote letters and books that became the New Testament that tried to explain the meaning of Jesus’ life, death and resurrection.  And we’re still grappling with understanding that meaning in 2024, and today in this sermon.

So what does all of this have to do with individual salvation and sharing the Gospel to my friend so my friend can be saved?   You may have noticed so far I’ve been using words like Israel and mankind (rather than the individual) – I’ve been talking about groups of people and communities.  When we read the Bible, I wonder sometimes whether we over-individualise certain verses, and fail to see the larger context, the larger story, that is of God’s purpose for Israel and the church, of what our divine corporate identity is to be.

I’ll give an example.  At the start of the sermon, I mentioned the common tools of the Gospel used in the 1970s/80s, like the 4 Spiritual Laws and the Romans Road.  From what I can tell on the internet, they are still being used today.  The Romans Road is a series of 4 or 5 verses plucked from different parts of the book of Romans.  One of them is Romans 5:8:

“But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us.” NRSV

Here is the way many Christians read this verse: 

While I was a sinner (e.g taking drugs, being envious, being selfish, not honouring my parents), he died for me, which means I can go to Heaven despite my sins.

But putting this verse in the larger context of Romans and the wider Bible, how about this as another way to read it?

While Israel, when humanity, was looking to other things besides God as giving meaning to their life, not relying on Him, rejecting Him as a community (Sin with a capital S), and while this led to societal breakdown and to the increase of individual sins and people going off the rails, and while all this was happening despite God time and again trying to show his love and guidance – while this terrible rejection of God from humanity was going on, God stepped into History and upped the ante, showing humanity EVEN again AND EVEN MORE how much he loves us, by sending us His Son to death, setting US free from the ‘death’ that we as a community were bringing on ourselves.  Sin ‘did its worst’ but he conquered it.  This means that we as individuals and as a community are free and empowered to bring his Kingdom indeed to Earth.

To me, this is a far richer way to understand Romans 5:8, and the ‘why’ of the Gospel.  The Lord’s prayer says thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.  Revelation 21, which Angela read earlier talks about the end of the age, when heaven comes down to earth, when the divine and humanity meet. 

God’s dwelling place is now among the people…He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death  or mourning or crying or pain.

Revelation 21 is a vision of a corporate salvation.  And it’s not about escaping the earth, but about the arrival of God’s Kingdom ON earth.  That’s our corporate goal.  That’s our corporate Gospel.

I am not suggesting that individual salvation is not important – but I propose that our thinking about it can be enhanced.  I am saved – saved from what, and in order to do what?  Well, not only saved at some future date from this world, to go to the new heaven and new earth, but rather saved NOW from the stranglehold of sin on my life, in order to free me up to live NOW as a divine image bearing human, to enjoy God’s creation now, to improve this world now, to belong to a community, a community of other empowered people whom God has also saved, maybe to work alongside them to bring hope and healing to our society, that is, to bring the kingdom of God to Tawa, NZ and the ends of the earth.  And in this way, bringing Revelation 21 to pass.

In closing I’d like to share something from NT Wright, an Anglican NT scholar who was the Bishop of Durham for a number of years and has written over 70 books.  In his book ‘The Day the Revolution Began’, he says this as a commentary on Galatians 1:4:

“The loving purpose of God, working through the sin-forgiving death of Jesus, frees us from the power of the present evil age, so that we may be part of God’s new age, his new creation, launched already when Jesus rose from the dead, awaiting its final completion when he returns, but active now through the work of rescued rescuers, the redeemed human beings called to bring redeeming love into the world – the justified justice-bringers, the reconciled reconcilers, the Passover People.” (Pages 364-5.)

Amen.  So be it.

Further notes and resources

  1. The podcast episode featuring Matthew W Bates who asked the room of pastors ‘Why the gospel’

https://podcast.choosetruthovertribe.com/episodes/why-the-gospel-matthew-bates?hsLang=en

  • The Day the Revolution Began (2016), by NT Wright – the book from which I used to conclude the sermon.  NT Wright is well known for his criticism of the North American church’s overemphasis on ‘going to heaven when you die’ – see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/N._T._Wright
  • Other NT Wright resources

– https://ntwrightpage.com/

– https://www.premierunbelievable.com/shows/ask-nt-wright-anything  – a series of 30 minute podcasts where NT Wright asks listener questions.  I’ve found this very helpful.

– Go to youtube and search “NT Wright” – you’ll find many sermons, lectures, interviews etc.

  • Divine Government:  God’s Kingship in the Gospel of Mark (1990) by RT France

“…the personal change of values which Jesus required must obviously have an effect on the lifestyle and relationships of those who followed him.  The new relationship with God…could never by a purely private, individual affair, and it is particularly in their relations with one another that the new values of God’s kingship must begin to operate.  Hence the frequent stress on matters of status and leadership, the call to welcome the insignificant, and to serve rather than to be served….In this topsy-turvy community, where the first are last and the last first, the new values of divine government can begin to take visible form.   And when that happens, as a result of the inward transformation which God’s kingship demands, there is the promise of a truly transformed society, not changes merely by a reordering of its structures, but by a reorientation of its values.” Page 62.

  • Further to the idea that kingship can inspire a positive corporate identity, this is from the Guardian’s review of ‘The King’s Speech’ flim:

“When war broke out in 1939, he [King George VI] became an unlikely symbol of national resistance, his mundane domesticity a reminder of what Britain was fighting for. ….[H]is newsreel appearances were regularly interrupted by applause from the audience. But it was not merely deference that explains the public reaction, even though it played its part. The truth, I suspect, is that when thousands applauded the King in the cinema, they were not just acknowledging their monarch; they were applauding themselves.”  https://www.theguardian.com/film/2011/jan/02/the-kings-speech-george-vi

Tawa Baptist

His plan, your story

Sermon by Neville Gardner

Please bear with me as I give a brief outline of the story of The Penguin Who Wanted to Fly, which I read out earlier in the service. This is for people who will read the online text or listen to a recording of the sermon, which don’t include the story.

The story was of a penguin who thought that, because penguins are birds, they belong in the sky. Against the advice of all the other penguins, he tried hard to fly, running faster and jumping from higher, but always crashing. Even from the highest iceberg he could find, he just crashed into the sea – only to find that he could fly, in the upside-down sky beneath the waves.

At the risk of spoiling the fun of a good story, I’d like to raise four things that struck me:

The penguin was determined to carry out his own plan for his life

The penguin tried to succeed using his own strength and determination

The penguin did not listen to advice

The penguin wanted to share his story (I like to think the penguin who told the story to the man on the beach was the same as the one featured in it, but I can’t be sure).

Each of these topics merits its own sermon. But, because this is the first sermon of the year, I thought I’d just do a gentle overview. Stir up your thinking, perhaps.

  • The penguin put all his time and effort into carrying out his own plan.

This was beyond a simple New Year resolution – trying to fly was everything to the penguin. Self-help books by the shelf-full tell us that if we try hard enough, practice enough and sacrifice enough, we can do anything, be anybody. Inspirational, even if not true.

Working towards your own dreams and challenging yourself with New Year resolutions can have their place. But now is as good a time as any to remember that God has plans for you too. He has a general plan, the same for everyone, and he has a specific plan, different for each person.

The Bible is full of what God wants for, and from, us. One summary is contained in Micah 6:8

“. . the Lord has told us what is good. What he requires of us is this: to do what is just, to show constant love, and to live in humble fellowship with our God.”

Matthew 22 records that Jesus said “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the most important commandment. The second most important commandment is like it: ‘Love your neighbour as you love yourself.”

God’s general plan is for everyone to have a relationship with Him, to love Him and to love other people.

As well as this general plan, God has a specific plan for each individual believer. Ephesians 2:10 tells us “God has made us what we are, and in our union with Christ Jesus he has created us for a life of good deeds, which he has already prepared for us to do.” 1 Corinthians:12 gives us a picture of a body made up of many parts, each with a vital role to play – everyone who follows Jesus is like a part of his body (meaning the church), each with a special role to play. For you, this role is called your ministry.

God has given every believer a personal ‘gift’ to use to serve him. That means we are wired to care more about some things than others, with a particular style of relating to other people. Every believer has at least one such gift – a passion, a heart for serving God in a particular way.

1 Peter 4:10-11 tells us

“Each one of us, as a good manager of God’s particular gift, must use for the good of others the special gift he has received from God. Whoever preaches must preach God’s messages; whoever serves must serve with the strength that God gives him, so that in all things praise may be given to God through Jesus Christ.”

Our gifts are to be used for God and others, not ourselves.

If you are one of the many Christians who are not sure what God’s plan is for them, ask him. James 1:5 says “But if any of you lacks wisdom, he should pray to God, who will give it to him; because God gives generously and graciously to all.” But be prepared to wait for an answer.

We are used to reading in the Bible of times when God sent an angel or a dream to people, telling them exactly what he wanted them to do. And they did it. Remember Mary, Joseph and the shepherds in the Christmas story? If only it was always that simple.

From my own experience, and from talking with others, I don’t think God always suddenly reveals a lifetime plan to someone and expects them to accept it and get on with it. His plans may well be revealed to you gradually during your journey with him. God gives you the tools and guidance for carrying out his plan, but expects you to use your own skills and initiative too. Of course, there are times during your journey when God says “I want you to do a certain thing, and I want you to do it now.” We need to be open to those opportunities.

A couple of years ago I was due to give a sermon here, and I was sitting in church waiting for the service to start. All of a sudden, a single new sentence popped into my head, and I knew I had to include it in the sermon. I found a pen and scribbled it into my notes. After the service, someone thanked me for saying something that they had really needed to hear – you’ve guessed, it was that last minute sentence. If I learned nothing else from that experience, I know to keep a pen handy!

As an example of God only gradually revealing his plan, I’m afraid I’m going to use my experiences again. Not because it’s a particularly good example, but because it’s the one I know.

For the first 30 years of my life, I knew nothing of God. I was like the penguin, doing my own thing, succeeding or failing by my own abilities, or lack of. After leaving school and working for 10 years, I came up with a plan to be an archaeologist. I went to university, worked hard, got some good qualifications and prepared to fulfil my dream. Then God stepped in, and being an archaeologist didn’t figure in his plan for me.

To start with, he formed a relationship with me. My eyes were opened, just like those of the penguin when he found he was meant to fly in the sea, not the sky.

And the change to my life was almost as dramatic – less than a year after accepting Jesus, I was married and had moved from the UK right around the world to New Zealand. Here, my relationship with God developed.

At some stage, God gave me a gift of teaching, for want of a better word, something I had not been interested in before. I started a job that helped me develop teaching and writing skills, and looking back, this was part of my preparation for ministry.

It was only after developing a relationship with God, realising my God-given gifts and gaining the necessary skills and personal style of doing things, that God started the next stage in his plan – He put me to work teaching about Him. Firstly with children, then adults and all ages. At various stages along the way, such as when Will first asked me to give a sermon, I would ask “Really God, you want me to do that now? Am I ready?” I could sense God shaking his head and saying “I am God you know, I don’t make mistakes.”

I think I now have a broad awareness of God’s plan for me, much of it gained by hindsight.

God’s plan for me involved forming a relationship with him, receiving a special gift, developing the skills I needed, and only then obviously serving him as he intended. This was just my experience – things might happen, or have already happened, quite differently for you.

  • Back to the penguin in the story. He tried to carry out his own plan, using his own strength and determination.

There is only one person who can carry out the ministry role God has planned for you – you. But you will need his help, your own strength will not be enough.

In Philippians 4: 13 Paul said “I have the strength to face all conditions by the power that Christ gives me.”

Proverbs 3 says “Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Never rely on what you think you know. Remember the Lord in everything you do, and he will show you the right way.”

  • The penguin did not listen to advice.

We have no excuse for doing this, because we each have the Holy Spirit to teach and guide us, to help us overcome our weaknesses. The Holy Spirit also helps us know God better, and helps him know us. When we don’t know what to pray for, the Holy Spirit will intercede for us.

Romans 8:26-27 tells us: “In the same way the Spirit also comes to help us, weak as we are. For we do not know how we ought to pray; the Spirit himself pleads with God for us in groans that words cannot express. And God, who sees into our hearts, knows what the thought of the Spirit is; because the Spirit pleads with God on behalf of his people and in accordance with his will.”

  • The penguin wanted to share his story

This is a positive aspect of the tale. The Bible teaches that followers of Jesus will want to tell others about Him and what he’s done in their lives. Sharing with others is a vital part of the Christian life – it’s another aspect of God’s general plan for everyone. Just before Jesus was taken up to Heaven, it is recorded in Acts 1:8 that he told his disciples “But when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, you will be filled with power, and you will be witnesses for me in Jerusalem, in all Judaea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.”

The story of The Penguin Who Wanted to Fly was just that, a story. But I have used it to remind us of a few aspects of our journey with God. Your story will be different from mine, it will be different from everyone else’s, but it will be your story, one God has created with you. God’s plan for you is a story that’s still being written.

Are you ready to turn the next page?

Tawa Baptist

Christmas Day Message

Video Link: https://youtu.be/8O8tlfGlmuQ

Learning by Experience:

Kia Koutou and good morning everyone.

Mark Twain once said, ‘If you hold a cat by the tail, you learn things you cannot learn any other way.’

In other words, some things you cannot be told. Some things can only be discovered through personal experience. What you discover when you hold a cat by the tail is not to hold a cat by the tail. We tend to learn more from our mistakes than our successes. 

Albert Einstein, another dude with bushy hair and an impressive mustache, put it this way, ‘Learning is an experience. Everything else is just information.’

The point here is that we learn by doing. You don’t learn how to hammer a nail by watching The Repair Shop. You learn to hammer a nail by hammering a nail. 

Or take parenting as an example. Parenting books and Ted Talks may provide helpful information, but the real learning comes with the experience of trying to settle a crying baby or being there to support your kids when they need you or managing your feelings of powerlessness as your son or daughter leaves home. 

So does this principle of learning by experience work with God as well? Because God is not like us. God is Spirit. We can’t really see God or take him out for a coffee to get to know him.

Well, learning about God is not exactly the same as learning to hammer a nail or be a parent. But we still learn by experience.

We learn faith by being trusted.

We learn hope by being made to wait.

We learn love by being forgiven.

And we learn about God through Jesus.

Yes, you will pick up some helpful information by listening to sermons and reading spiritual books but the real learning about God comes with an experience of Jesus’ Spirit. 

When Mary (the mother of Jesus) first learned she was with child, she went to visit Elizabeth who was about six months pregnant with John the Baptist. 

41 When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. 42 In a loud voice she exclaimed: “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear! 43 But why am I so favoured, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?

Through the experience of the Holy Spirit, Elizabeth learned that Mary was carrying the Messiah of God. Elizabeth felt God’s presence in herself, and it was the experience of pure joy.

When the angels appeared to the shepherds, proclaiming the birth of the Messiah, the shepherds didn’t just say, ‘O yeah, good to know.’ Rather they hurried off to find Mary and Joseph and the baby lying in a manger.

They were not satisfied with mere information. They wanted to experience the presence of the Christ child for themselves, and that experience affected them. It compelled them to share the good news.  

When the wise men saw the star shining in the east, they knew from their research that it was significant. These wise men understood that real learning comes through experience.  So, they set off on a long journey to find the King of the Jews and experience his presence for themselves, in person. They were not disappointed.

Fast forward 33 years and we read about Thomas, the disciple who would not take other people’s word for it. When Thomas’ friends told him the information that Jesus had been raised from the dead, Thomas wanted to experience the risen Christ for himself. Let me touch him. Let me put my fingers in his wounds.

A week later Jesus appeared to Thomas and Thomas discovered firsthand that Jesus is both human and divine. Learning is an experience.

What is your experience this Christmas? Is it a busy time for you? A stressful time, a week of running around trying to fit everything in. When Christmas is uncomfortably full it can be difficult to experience the presence of Christ. Difficult but not impossible.

The very first Christmas was busy and full, messy and unpredictable. Nevertheless, Jesus was present in the most unlikely of places, a feeding trough. The Spirit of Jesus has a way of showing up where we least expect him.  Make room for the Spirit.

What is your experience this Christmas? Is it a lonely time, a sad time, an empty time when you feel the absence of those you love. Everyone around you seems to be happy but you cannot wait for the season to end and for things to return to normal. 

When Christmas is painful and joyless it can be difficult to experience the presence of Christ. Difficult but not impossible. Jesus was born into a violent world, a sad world, a troubled world. The good news is Jesus was born to redeem this world through his death and resurrection.

Blessed are you who are sad or lonely this Christmas. You are closer to God than you think. 

Let me pray for you…

Loving God, we thank you for entering into the human experience through Jesus. May you be real for us this Christmas and always. Open our hearts and minds to the presence of Christ, that we would learn from you. Amen.  

Tawa Baptist

Before & After

Scripture: Ezekiel 36:26-27

Video Link: https://youtu.be/RQtLqS7-W9s

Before and After (the difference Jesus makes)

Before humankind learned to cook, people had to eat their meat raw. Since learning to cook though, there has been a lot less food poisoning and better nourishment.

Before the invention of the wheel, it was a lot harder to move things around. It took a great deal longer to get anything done. Since the wheel though, people have been able to carry more stuff and get places faster.

Before someone thought up the printing press, people had to copy words by hand onto scrolls. It took ages and was really expensive, which meant not many people got the opportunity to read or write. Since the printing press though, books have become more accessible, which makes the transfer of information a lot easier.

Before the discovery of penicillin, people often died from infections and the average life expectancy was less. Since penicillin though, there have been more people surviving into old age. Antibiotics have reduced human suffering considerably.

Christmas is a time when we celebrate Jesus’ coming into the world. Jesus’ life makes a bigger difference than the wheel, the printing press, penicillin and cooking all put together. The main difference Jesus makes is to our relationship with God.

Before Christ, if someone did something wrong, they had to sacrifice a goat or a lamb in order to be forgiven. Since Jesus’ death on the cross though, there is no need for animal sacrifice. If we forgive others, God will forgive us.  

Before Christ, if someone wanted to belong to God’s people, they had to be Jewish. Since Jesus’ resurrection though, the key is not genetics, but faith. When we accept Jesus, God accepts us, no matter what our whakapapa or family tree. Because of Jesus we can call God, Father.

Now, in talking about the positive difference Christ makes, we might think that because of Jesus we can get God to do whatever we want. But that is not how it works. God is not like Santa Claus. Sometimes doing the right thing and following Jesus makes your life, on this earth, harder.

Through Jesus we can be friends with God but the point of being friends with God is not to get what we want. The point is to do what God wants and enjoy him forever. Jesus shows us what God wants.

The prophets of the Old Testament looked forward to Jesus’ coming. They knew the difference the Messiah would make to our inner life. In Ezekiel 36 the Lord says through his messenger…

26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.

The heart, in this context, represents a person’s inner life, the place inside you where decisions are made. The heart is not just your emotions, it’s also your mind and your will.

A ‘heart of stone’ is a dead heart, it’s a mind and will that is unresponsive to God. Whereas a heart of flesh is a living heart, it’s a mind and will that is obedient to God.

With the birth of Jesus, God offers humanity a heart of flesh. It is through the Spirit of Jesus that God gives us a new heart, a new attitude, a new way of thinking and feeling so we are inclined to do what God wants.

In a moment we will pray. I will pray the words in plain type, and I invite you to respond with the words in bold. Let us pray…

Father God, we thank you for Jesus who reveals your love and truth.

            Hallowed be your name.

Father God, we thank you for Jesus who brings heaven to earth.

            May your kingdom come, and your will be done. 

Father God, we thank you for Jesus who understands our needs and longings.

            Give us this day our daily bread.

Father God, we thank you for Jesus who takes away the sin of the world.

            Forgive us our sin as we forgive those who sin against us.

Father God, we thank you for Jesus who shows us Your way.

            Deliver us from evil.

Father God, we thank you for the Spirit of Jesus who transforms our heart.

Yours is the glory. Amen.

Tawa Baptist

Wedded to Wisdom

Scripture: Proverbs 31:10-31

Video Link: https://youtu.be/kEbqD1U8ugQ

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • Wonder Woman, or
  • Wisdom Woman
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

If someone says to you, ‘His head is in the clouds’, they don’t literally mean that his head is high in the air floating around in the mist. They are using picture language to convey the idea that he is day dreaming.

Likewise, if someone says to you, ‘I feel like a pizza’, you know they are not talking about feeling hot and cheesy. They are speaking figuratively. They are saying, I feel like eating a pizza.

And if someone says, ‘I worked my socks off’, they don’t mean their socks literally came off while they were working. They mean I worked really hard.

Today we continue our series in the book of Proverbs. Much of Proverbs is poetry. It uses metaphor or picture language to convey ideas. Because Proverbs uses picture language you cannot take everything at face value. If what you are reading doesn’t make sense literally, then think figuratively. 

This morning’s message focuses on a poem at the end Proverbs. In the original Hebrew this is an alphabetical acrostic poem which means each line of the poem begins with the next letter of the Hebrew alphabet.

An English acrostic might go something like, she is Admirable, she is Beautiful, she is Clever, she is Discerning, she is Empathic and so on. 

Some readers see this as the A to Z of being the ideal wife because, if we read it literally, the poem seems to describe a kind of Wonder Woman with superpowers for doing housework, raising children, making money, helping the poor, giving wise advice and making her husband successful. 

If we read this poem metaphorically though, it is not talking about who you marry. It’s talking about wisdom. It’s saying, whoever you are, whether you are male or female, single or in a relationship, make wisdom your partner for life. Wisdom is the ideal help mate. From Proverbs 31, verse 10 we read…

10 How hard it is to find a capable wife! She is worth far more than jewels! 11 Her husband puts his confidence in her, and he will never be poor. 12 As long as she lives, she does him good and never harm. 13 She keeps herself busy making wool and linen cloth. 14 She brings home food from out-of-the-way places, as merchant ships do. 15 She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and to tell her servant women what to do. 16 She looks at land and buys it, and with money she has earned she plants a vineyard. 17 She is a hard worker, strong and industrious. 18 She knows the value of everything she makes, and works late into the night. 19 She spins her own thread and weaves her own cloth. 20 She is generous to the poor and needy. 21 She doesn’t worry when it snows, because her family has warm clothing. 22 She makes bedspreads and wears clothes of fine purple linen. 23 Her husband is well known, one of the leading citizens. 24 She makes clothes and belts, and sells them to merchants. 25 She is strong and respected and not afraid of the future. 26 She speaks with a gentle wisdom. 27 She is always busy and looks after her family’s needs. 28 Her children show their appreciation, and her husband praises her. 29 He says, “Many women are good wives, but you are the best of them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive and beauty disappears, but a woman who honours the Lord should be praised. 31 Give her credit for all she does. She deserves the respect of everyone.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

As I said earlier, there are basically two ways to understand this poem at the end of Proverbs, literally or metaphorically. Is the poem describing an actual human being, the ideal Wonder Woman that every man should aspire to marry?

Or is the poem describing wisdom herself, so the capable wife is not an actual human being but a metaphor personifying wisdom from God? Let’s starts by exploring a literal interpretation.

Wonder Woman:

We might summarise the qualities of the wife described in Proverbs 31 with the following C’s: character, commitment, capability, compassion and confidence. 

She is a woman of noble character (verse 10). Character has to do with virtue. Things like, honesty, faithfulness, courage and so on. Good character creates and maintains trust and trust is the foundation of any relationship.

Another important quality necessary for any long-term relationship is commitment. As Abraham Lincoln said, ‘Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality’.

Verse 12 says this wonder woman does good to her husband as long as she lives. That’s real commitment.  

There are times in a marriage when it is simply hard graft because of circumstances outside of your control. There are times when you just have to grit your teeth and commit yourself to getting through the tough stuff together.

The wife described in Proverbs 31 is a capable woman, meaning she has skills in working with her hands (verse 19) and in making good business decisions (verse 16). But she also has the capacity and the strength to work her socks off and get the job done (verse 17).

Verse 13 says, she keeps herself busy making wool & linen cloth. The original Hebrew text does not actually say ‘busy’. It literally translates ‘pleasure of her hands’ (or ‘eager hands’), meaning she enjoys working. Creative work is not drudgery to her. [1]

She is compassionate, opening her arms to the poor and helping the needy (verse 20). There is wisdom in taking care of those less fortunate in your neighbourhood. If you do, they are more likely to take care of you and your family when it is in their power to do so.      

Verse 26 shows us another aspect of her compassion. She speaks with gentle wisdom. The idea here is that she has just the right word in season. Truth with grace. She knows how to turn away wrath with a gentle word. 

Verse 21 tells us she is confident, not a worrier. She is not anxious about her household because she is prepared. Confidence is contagious. This wonder woman inspires confidence in others.

Most people are attracted to a partner by charm or beauty. But charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting. So, if you are looking for a marriage partner then competence, commitment, capability, compassion and confidence are all helpful qualities to keep in mind.

One quality that is conspicuous by its absence, in Proverbs 31, is compatibility. Compatibility has to do with how easily you get along. You want your partner in marriage to have a personality that fits with yours and doesn’t grate. You want to have the same values and be heading in the same direction, otherwise life will quickly become a grind.

A literal reading of Proverbs 31 paints a picture of a woman who is high performance and low maintenance. It is hard to imagine anyone living up to the standard set by this poem though. It seems a bit unreal, sort of like the Cosby Show – trying to hold up an ideal that is often divorced from the reality of everyday experience.

There are perhaps only three women in the entire Bible who come close to fitting the description of the wife in Proverbs 31…

Ruth probably fits the ideal best. She honours her first husband after he dies by looking after her mother-in-law and finding a relative of her husband to marry and provide an heir.

She works extremely hard, is good with her hands and demonstrates wisdom and loyalty, so much so that Boaz (a man of standing in the community) marries her and praises her. Indeed, she is praised by everyone in the community who say she is better than seven sons.

Abigail is another (almost) example of the Proverbs 31 wife. She is an astute business-woman who manages her household well. However, her first husband seems to take her for granted and she doesn’t have a great deal of respect for him either.

Looking at the New Testament; Lydia (possibly) approximates the ideal woman.

I’m not sure what her marital status was but Lydia was a wealthy trader in purple cloth, she honoured God and she provided for the apostles.

The point is this wonder woman of Proverbs 31 is hard to find even in the Bible. So how realistic is it for us to read this passage in a literal way? Because a literal reading seems to exclude most women…

It excludes single women and women who cannot have children.

It excludes women who can’t sew or cook. 

It excludes women whose children have gone off the rails.

It excludes women who don’t work outside the home.

It excludes women whose husbands share the domestic duties because she does work outside the home. It excludes women who don’t have servants.  

And it excludes women whose husband or children take them for granted.

It basically excludes any woman who needs more than 4 hours sleep a day.  

Apparently, some Jewish men used to recite this poem to their wives on Sabbath evenings. [2] If we give them the benefit of the doubt it was perhaps a gesture of their love and appreciation. A way of saying, ‘I see all that you do for our family’.  

But I imagine there were some weeks when the woman did not appreciate it – like she was being reminded of all the ways she did not measure up.

And this is one of the dangers with reading Proverbs 31 in a literal way. Girls might think this is how I should be. This is my duty or else I fail and am not worthy.  

The other danger with reading Proverbs 31 literally is that boys might think this is how my wife is supposed to be. She is supposed to do everything for me and the kids. Then there is disappointment when she does not live up to his expectations.

Ladies, if you try to live up to this, then you are just going to wear yourself out and you will probably end up alienating your husband for all your efforts. When I look at Proverbs 31 from a literal perspective, I find myself asking, ‘When do this couple ever spend any time together?’

She is so busy doing things apart from him that there is not much opportunity for companionship or intimacy in their relationship.

It’s like the chorus line in that song by The Chainsmokers and Coldplay. I’m not looking for somebody with some superhuman gifts, some superhero, some fairy tale bliss. I just want someone I can turn to, somebody I can kiss.

So, is there anything redeemable from a literal reading of this poem?

Well, yes. On the positive side we see a woman who is empowered and trusted by her husband. She has freedom and independence to use her initiative, to buy land and trade.

We could view this as quite enlightened for its time. It’s sort of a ‘women can anything’ text centuries before that became fashionable. It also shows men they don’t need to feel threatened or insecure if their wife is more competent than they are.   

The poem finishes by saying, a woman who honours the Lord should be praised. Give her credit for all she does. She deserves the respect of everyone.

This can be taken literally. Here we see a man who appreciates his wife and does not take her for granted. Men, don’t wait for your wife or mother or sister to meet some perfect ideal before you say good things to her.

Express your appreciation with words and with listening. Say it by helping with the kids and the housework. Say it by taking her out to a nice restaurant. Say it anyway that she can hear it, as long as the message is ‘I love and appreciate you’.

Wisdom Woman:

Okay, so a literal reading of the text can offer some helpful advice, but it also comes with some hooks. On the whole it is probably more helpful (and truer to the context) to understand the woman in Proverbs 31, not as a literal human being, but rather as a metaphor personifying wisdom.

Personification is when we give human characteristics to something that is not human. For example, in A.A. Milne’s stories of Winnie the Pooh – Pooh Bear has a friend called ‘Owl’. Owl is a personification of wisdom, just as Eeyore personifies melancholy and Piglet personifies loyalty.   

In a similar vein the writer of Proverbs 31 personifies wisdom, giving the abstract concept of wisdom, human characteristics.

As Kathleen O’Connor writes…

Rather than supplying the image of the correct marriage partner the poem [in Proverbs 31] serves as a summary of the whole Book of Proverbs. Its central character is no typical woman but the Wisdom Woman herself… this poem demonstrates what life is like once one has chosen to live with wisdom. [3]

In other words, the poem in Proverbs 31 is not suggesting that human wives need to wear themselves out trying to attain an impossible ideal. It is saying that men and women should intentionally seek wisdom like they would look for a marriage partner.

We should love wisdom, live with wisdom, sleep with wisdom, make a lifetime commitment to wisdom. Because then we (and our families) will enjoy all wisdom’s benefits.  

If we read Proverbs 31 metaphorically this is what it might sound like…

Verse 10 – How hard it is to find wisdom. She is worth far more than jewels.

This echoes Proverbs 8, where wisdom speaks as a woman saying…  

Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Verse 11 – The man who puts his confidence in wisdom will never be poor.

(As opposed to the man who puts his confidence in luck or dishonest gain.)

As long as she lives wisdom does him good and never harm.

Verses 13 & 14 – Wisdom works with eager hands. Wisdom brings home food from out of the way places. Wisdom gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family…

In other words, a wise man works to provide for his family. He doesn’t wait for things to fall into his lap. He doesn’t waste time doing busy work that bears little or no fruit. He enjoys working for a meaningful purpose, putting food on the table for the people he loves.

Verse 16 – Wisdom looks at land (she considers it first without rushing into a decision) then she buys it, and with money she has earned wisdom plants a vineyard.

This is like saying, a wise man does not leave his land lying unproductive. A wise man puts what he has to good use. Verse 16 is talking about stewardship.

Verses 17 & 18 – Wisdom is a hard worker, strong and industrious. Wisdom works late into the night.

This does not mean burning the candle at both ends or becoming a workaholic. That is not wisdom.

It could mean, a wise decision will go on working for you through the night, so you can sleep and have peace.

But it might also mean, if you have a problem to solve or a difficult decision to make, then often the wisest thing to do is sleep on it. As you sleep, wisdom does its work so when you wake in the morning the way forward is clearer.

The main point is that wisdom enables you to work smarter, so you don’t have to work harder.

Verse 20 – Wisdom is generous to the poor and needy.

In other words, it is wise to show practical compassion to those who are less fortunate. Better to have the poor on your side than to have them cursing you or worse.  

Verse 23 – Wisdom’s husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

The city gate, in ancient times, was sort of like the local council and court room. It was a place where the leaders of the city gathered to make community decisions.

When a man is wedded to wisdom, he earns respect and influence in the community. He is listened to.

We could go on, but you get the point. When we read Proverbs 31 metaphorically, thinking of the capable wife not as an actual human being but as Wisdom personified, then it takes on a whole new meaning.

Conclusion:

As I keep saying throughout this series, Jesus is the personification of God’s wisdom (both literally and metaphorically). Jesus embodies wisdom.

Jesus came that we might have abundant life. The yoke of Jesus’ wisdom is easy, meaning it fits us perfectly. And his burden is light, meaning he does not ask us to carry the weight of unrealistic expectations.  

When we make a lifetime commitment to following Jesus, we find wisdom.  

May God grant you a long and happy union with wisdom. Amen. 

Questions for discussion or reflection:

  1. What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?
  • How do you feel when you read Proverbs 31:10-31 literally? How do you feel when you read this same passage metaphorically?
  • What are the difficulties in reading Proverbs 31:10-31 literally? What parts can be read literally?
  • What sort of qualities are important to you in a long-term relationship? (E.g. marriage or friendship.)
  • How does the meaning of verses 17 & 18 change when read metaphorically? That is, Wisdom is a hard worker, strong and industrious. Wisdom works late into the night. 
  • How does Proverbs 31 point to Jesus?

[1] Graeme Goldsworthy, ‘Proverbs The Tree of Life’, page 163.

[2] Paul E. Koptak, NIVAC Proverbs, page 675

[3] Cited in Alice Ogden Bellis’ book ‘Helpmates, Harlots and Heroes’, page 198.

Tawa Baptist

Small Things

Scripture: Proverbs 30:24-31

Video Link: https://youtu.be/Jdd3YfZQhJ8

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • Small things
  • Proud things
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

Some would say that humility is the mother of all virtues. It is from humility that other virtues like patience, faithfulness, compassion and so on are born.

Rick Warren says, ‘Humility is not denying your strengths, humility is being honest about your weaknesses’. Charles Spurgeon said something similar, ‘Humility is the proper estimation of oneself’.

Humility then is closely related to honesty and truth. It is also the companion of wisdom. ‘True humility is staying teachable, regardless of how much you already know’.

Today we continue our series in the book of Proverbs, by focusing on chapter 30. Proverbs 30 contains the sayings of Agur. The main theme running through Proverbs 30 is the importance of humility and the danger of hubris or pride. 

Agur begins by saying he is the most ignorant of men. This is interesting, coming as it does near the end of the book. It is a little reminder to us that no matter how much we think we know, there is always more to learn.  

Agur also reinforces the point, made throughout Proverbs, that wisdom comes from knowledge of the holy one, from God.

We are not going to cover all of Proverbs 30 this morning. Just verses 24-31, which read…

24 “Four things on earth are small, yet they are extremely wise: 25 Ants are creatures of little strength, yet they store up their food in the summer; 26 hyraxes are creatures of little power, yet they make their home in the crags; 27 locusts have no king, yet they advance together in ranks; 28 a lizard can be caught with the hand, yet it is found in kings’ palaces.

29 “There are three things that are stately in their stride, four that move with stately bearing: 30 a lion, mighty among beasts, who retreats before nothing; 31 a strutting rooster, a he-goat, and a king secure against revolt.  

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

A riddle for you. What can you put in a bucket to make it weigh less? [Wait]

A hole. Our reading this morning has the sound and feel of a series of riddles.

In these verses we are presented with two sets of four things. The first set describes creatures that are humble and small but, despite their size, they thrive by wisdom.

The second set of four describes creatures that are proud and fearless in the way they walk. Sort of the opposite of the small wise creatures. Agur is inviting us to consider the contrast. Let’s begin with the small things. 

Small things:

The first of the four small but wise creatures is the ant. We came across the ant two months ago, in Proverbs 6.  

In Proverbs 30, the emphasis is on the ants’ foresight in gathering provisions in season. Relative to their body weight, ants are strong. But relative to a human being, a single ant is a creature of little strength and can be easily crushed.

Physical strength is less important, though, than wisdom. God has made this world so that it is not always survival of the strongest but rather survival of the wisest.

One wise thing about ants is that they work together. Working on your own (especially doing heavy physical labour) can be quite tough. But when you work as part of a team, there is a certain buoyancy or energy that carries you. Somehow the work doesn’t seem so overwhelming.

Ants survive and thrive by using whatever is at hand. Ants gather from the environment around them. They don’t sow crops, but they do harvest. Ants make do with what they can find.

One point of application is to open our eyes and notice what is in front of us. Sometimes, when we are facing a problem, we may look elsewhere for a solution, when God has already provided what we need in our own backyard.

The second of our humble but wise creatures is the hyrax, also known as the coney or the marmot or the rock badger. The hyrax is a small mammal, about the size of a rabbit.  

Its feet are made for climbing, which is handy for finding a home in rocky crags, where no one can touch them. Like ants, hyraxes use what is at hand in their local environment.

The hyrax has good eyesight and can spot a predator from around 900 metres away. For protection they live in colonies of up to 50 and tend to stay close together. There is wisdom in sticking together.

Hyraxes are not the same as ants in every way though. Ants are always busy, always on the move, always working. Whereas hyraxes don’t move much. Hyraxes have the ability to remain still and keep watch. Keeping still conserves energy and it avoids unwanted attention from predators.

There is wisdom in being still. To paraphrase Blaise Pascal: All human evil stems from a single cause, man’s inability to sit still in a room. We human beings have an unfortunate tendency to react out of fear or get involved in things that we should stay out of. The hyrax knows how to be still and mind its own business.

When was the last time you sat still in silence for half an hour and simply allowed yourself to be? It’s a lot harder than you might think.

The third of our small creatures is the locust. Locusts are like ants in that they have no king or commander and yet they are organized. They cooperate and work together as one. The focus here is on leadership.

For centuries the people of Israel managed without a king. They didn’t need an earthly king because God was their King. But then, in First Samuel, we read how the people asked for a king like the nations around them.

The prophet Samuel warned the people that a king would tax their income, take their sons off to war and place burdens on them. An earthly king is not unlike a swarm of locusts in what he devours.

But the people did not listen and so God gave them what they asked for. Suffice to say, it did not go well. Power is corrosive to humility. Power feeds the ego and distorts a person’s perception of themselves and those around them.       

The leaderless locusts pose the question: ‘What kind of people do you want to be – strong and led by a king? Actually, you don’t need that as much as you need wisdom.’ [1]

Time for another riddle. What month of the year has 28 days? [Wait]

All of them. Every month has 28 days.

In verse 28 we read of the fourth small creature that is wise: a lizard can be caught with the hand, yet it is found in kings’ palaces.

This verse is a bit of a riddle. I’m not sure what it means? Agur contrasts the lizard which is not powerful with the king who is powerful. Yet both share the same palace?

Is Agur saying that fortification and armed guards are no match for wisdom? Wisdom can breach the palace defenses in a way that military force cannot.

Or is he saying that wisdom is at home in the palace and that it is easily caught, like a lizard? The king needs to find wisdom in order to rule well.  

Or is Agur suggesting that kings are in some way similar to lizards? Is he saying that power attracts creepy crawly, reptile like people? Maybe. But not everyone in power is lizard like.

We do notice that lizards are different from ants, hyraxes and locusts in that lizards are not social creatures. The ant, the hyrax and the locust thrive in community together. Whereas the lizard is more territorial, more solitary.

Kings tend to be territorial as well. And the mantle of leadership is often lonely.  

Verse 28 remains a mystery to me. Perhaps that is the purpose of this riddle, to humble us. To show us how little we really know and therefore how important it is that we remain teachable.

Proud Things:

Okay, so we have touched on the small but wise things in verses 24-28. What about the proud and fearless creatures in verses 29-31. Let’s remind ourselves of what is written…

29 “There are three things that are stately in their stride, four that move with stately bearing: 30 a lion, mighty among beasts, who retreats before nothing; 31 a strutting rooster, a he-goat, and a king secure against revolt. 

The ant, the hyrax, the locust and the lizard were noted for being extremely wise, even though they are small compared to other creatures.

In contrast, the lion, the rooster, the he-goat and the king are noted for how they move. That is, the manner in which they carry themselves. How one moves has nothing to do with wisdom. How one moves is window dressing. It’s just advertising to create a desired perception. 

The smaller humble creatures get high praise, while the more powerful, stately looking creatures get a downgrade. What good is it to move with stately bearing? It’s almost like saying, the lion, the rooster, the goat and the king look impressive, but they are not that bright.    

Being brave and self-assured comes a poor second to being wise.

Perhaps we are meant to see some irony here. The he-goat and rooster are not like the lion. They are more like big fish in a small pond. Each would run from a lion. Which begs the question, is the king more like a lion or a farm animal? [2]

The goat and the rooster remind us there is folly in the small pretending to be great. The ant, the hyrax, the locust and the lizard are small but they do not pretend to be great. They embrace their smallness and use it to their advantage. 

Agur seems to be warning against illusions of grandeur. The message is, know yourself and your limitations. More than that, accept yourself and use what you’ve got to your advantage.

‘Humility is not denying your strengths, humility is being honest about your weaknesses’.

The hyrax has the humility and wisdom to accept its own strengths and weaknesses. The hyrax is good at climbing, but it is not a strong fighter. So, it makes a home in the rocky crags where predators cannot reach and therefore where it won’t need to fight.

The rooster seems to live in denial of its weaknesses and ends up on your dinner plate.

Parallel with this, Agur may be inviting us to discern what is a legitimate threat and what is not, so we make better choices for our own wellbeing.

The lion is an apex predator. Although lions do not normally hunt people, you wouldn’t want to get too close to one. Lions are wild creatures and do not follow any sort of moral code. They are driven by hunger, not mercy or justice. You are wise to stay well clear of lions.

Roosters and goats, on the other hand, may strut around like they own the place, but we don’t need to fear them. Roosters and goats look to us to care for them.

It’s similar with people. Some people are like lions. They are strong and powerful, a genuine threat. You cannot reason with them and so you are best to give them a wide berth. Other people though are more like roosters. They make a lot of noise and appear confident, but you don’t need to fear them.

The trick is being able to tell the difference. You don’t want to mistake a lion for a rooster.

The fourth thing that moves with stately bearing is, a king secure against revolt. This line can also be translated, a king with his army around him. Either way, there is an implied criticism here. If the king’s confidence is in his army or in the numbers supporting him, then he is not truly wise.

In Psalm 33 we read, ‘No king is saved by the size of his army; no warrior escapes by his great strength… But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love…’

Real power comes from wisdom that fears God and acts uprightly. [3]

To ignore God is as arrogant and ridiculous as a strutting rooster or billy goat.

In short, when we put the small but wise creatures alongside the strong and proud, we see the power of the weak and the weakness of those in power.  

Conclusion:

What is as small as a mouse but guards a house like a lion? [Wait]

A lock.

Jesus liked riddles. Many of his parables contained riddles.

Jesus also liked to champion the small things of God’s creation.

In Matthew 13, the Lord says… 

“The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his field. 32 Though it is the smallest of all seeds, yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds come and perch in its branches.”

God’s kingdom may start small, but it grows and provides shelter for those who (like birds) are small but wise. Jesus followed this parable with a similar one…

33 “The kingdom of heaven is like yeast that a woman took and mixed into about sixty poundsof flour until it worked all through the dough.”

Yeast makes the dough rise. The yeast of God’s kingdom, which is small, has the wisdom to raise and transform whole households and communities. Indeed, the whole world.

Small things done with great love are the mustard seeds and yeast of God’s kingdom. The mustard seeds and yeast of God’s kingdom are in your heart and hands.

What small thing can you do with great love this week?

Questions for discussion or reflection:

What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?

  • What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? How can you make the most of both your strengths and weaknesses?
  • Discuss / reflect on what we can learn from ants, hyraxes, locusts and lizards. What do they share in common? How are they different? What do these creatures reveal about God?   
  • When was the last time you sat still in silence? What happened in the silence?
  • Discuss / reflect on what we can learn from the lion, the rooster, the he-goat and the king. How are they different from the small but wise creatures of verses 24-28?
  • Can you think of a time when someone did something small for you, with great love? What did they do and what affect did it have? What small thing can you do with great love this week?

[1] Paul Koptak, NIVAC Proverbs.

[2] Ibid.

[3] Ibid.

Tawa Baptist

The Right Way?

Scriptures: Proverbs 16:25; 14:12; 16:2; 16:7; 12:15; Jeremiah 27;

Matthew 7:13-14; 5:3-12

Video Link: https://youtu.be/iCizzefULtY

The Right Way?

Good morning everyone.

Today we continue our series in the book of Proverbs. Proverbs offers practical wisdom for this life.

The ancient world, in which Proverbs was composed, was largely an oral culture. Most information was passed on by word of mouth, rather than reading and writing.  

There was no internet, so you couldn’t google something to learn about it. And books, as we know them, hadn’t been invented yet. The ancients did write things on scrolls or on walls but reading and writing was an expensive exercise and access to writing materials was not common or widespread.

If you wanted to know something, you had to ask a person who knew what they were talking about and then listen carefully. Storytelling, poetry and song were often used to help people remember what they heard. Repetition was another strategy used to commit ideas to memory.

One thing you notice as you read through Proverbs is the repetition. Some Proverbs are repeated word for word in different chapters and other Proverbs are rephrased in a slightly different way.     

The focus of our message today is Proverbs 16, verse 25, which reads…

There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

Where it says man, it means human being, both men and women.

This verse is basically saying that things are not always as they appear at first. The way something begins is not always how it ends. Or, as Bob Dylan put it, ‘What looks large from a distance, up close is never that big.’

More than this though, Proverbs 16 verse 25, is saying that we human beings are limited in our knowledge and understanding. We cannot rely solely on our own inner compass, or our own judgement. We need an external point of reference to check we are on the right path.  

If you are building a house, then you don’t just use your eye to determine if something is straight. You use a plumb line, a tape measure and a spirit level. Because what looks straight to the naked eye may be off by inches.

Or if you are a guitarist or a violinist then you don’t just tune your instrument by ear. You tune your instrument to a piano that you know is in tune or you use an electronic tuner, as an external point of reference.

Or if you are travelling a great distance in the wilderness or on the open sea, you don’t just follow your gut or your instinct. You use a compass or a sextant or the stars or GPS.      

There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death, is repeated, word for word, in Proverbs 14, verse 12.

We also find similar proverbs elsewhere. In chapter 16, verse 2, for example we read: All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord.

This gives a slightly different nuance of meaning. The idea here is that our mind has a way of fooling us. Our brain has this unfortunate tendency to be biased and filter out (or deny) the inconvenient truth about ourselves.

We might genuinely believe we are doing something with pure motives, when in fact we have mixed motives without being aware of it. Maybe we are compensating for the guilt we feel over something we did in our past. Or maybe we are really more interested in making ourselves look good in the eyes of others. Disinterested virtue is rare.

Each of us has what Carl Jung called a ‘shadow’. Your shadow is that part of yourself that you cannot see. Both good and bad lie hidden in your shadow. God sees what’s in your shadow, but you can’t. None of us is as good as we imagine ourselves to be.        

Proverbs 12, verse 15, gives another take on chapter 16, verse 25… 

The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.

This is almost the same as saying: There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death, except Proverbs 12:15 puts the accent on listening to good advice. Seeking the advice of others is one way of using an external point of reference to check whether we are on the right track or not.

The Bible is another external point of reference. When we read the Bible with an open mind, we are seeking the advice of wise men and women from ancient times. Of course, interpretation is key. We still need other believers to moderate our reading of Scripture, so we do not mislead ourselves. More importantly, we need the illumination of the Holy Spirit to discern God’s word.   

Jesus may have had Proverbs 16, verse 25 in mind when he said…

13 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”

The broad road seems right to a person, but it leads to death. While the narrow road seems wrong, but it leads to life.

I don’t think Jesus is talking about being broad minded or narrow minded here. I think the broad road is a poetic way of talking about the easy or popular option, maybe even the cheat’s option. While the narrow road is a poetic way of talking about the more difficult but more honest option. 

When Jesus was being tempted by Satan in the wilderness, the Devil offered Jesus the broad road, the easy road, to power and success. ‘Bow down in worship to me and I will give you all the kingdoms of the world’.

But Jesus refused. Jesus chose the narrow road, the more difficult but honest road, of remaining faithful to God. Jesus stayed loyal to his heavenly Father, even though the narrow road went via the cross. Ultimately though, after the cross, the narrow road led to resurrection and eternal life.

So, if there is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death, how then do we know we are on the right path? How can we discern the way that leads to life and the way that leads to death?

We may listen to the advice of others but if their advice is bad, then where does that leave us? Likewise, we may read the Bible but if we misinterpret what we read then we end up on the wrong path anyway.

Well, I believe that if you are genuine in asking God to show you the right way and you are honest with yourself, the Lord will guide your steps.

 In Proverbs 16, verse 7, we read…

When a man’s ways are pleasing to the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.

So being at peace with your enemies is a sign that you are on the right path.  

We should note that Proverbs 16, verse 7, is not a promise. It’s not a guarantee. Rather, it is a general rule. When we live in a way that pleases God, we can normally expect to be at peace with those around us.

There are exceptions to this rule of course. But, for the most part, if you do justly, show mercy and walk humbly, then you are more likely to enjoy peace with your neighbours. Makes sense right.   

Scripture interprets Scripture. What examples do we find in the Bible to illustrate this idea that there is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.

One example that comes to mind is found in the book of Jeremiah. Jeremiah was an Old Testament prophet who predicted the fall of Jerusalem. Jeremiah’s message from God was, don’t resist the might of the Babylonian empire.

Any nation that does not serve the king of Babylon will be punished with sword, famine and plague… But any nation that does bow its neck under the yoke of the king of Babylon and serve him, will live in its own land.

In other words, do not try to defend yourselves against the Babylonian army because you are not going to win.

To the Jews of his day, Jeremiah seemed unpatriotic. He seemed to lack faith in God. Other prophets (false ones) were telling the people that God would fight for them and Jerusalem would never fall.

And what these false prophets were saying seemed right to the people. Afterall, only a century earlier, during the time of king Hezekiah and the prophet Isaiah, God delivered Jerusalem from the Assyrians.

Hardly anyone agreed with Jeremiah’s minority report and Jerusalem was destroyed with the survivors being taken into exile, just as Jeremiah predicted.

Jesus had a similar message for the Israelites of his day. Like Jeremiah, Jesus wept over Jerusalem.

Jesus’ message was, don’t resist the Romans. My kingdom is not of this world. Turn the other cheek. Walk the extra mile. This is the way of peace. If you fight against the Romans, you will cause yourself unimaginable suffering.

Tragically, the people ignored Jesus. Resisting the might of the Roman empire seemed right to most Jews at the time, but it led to death. Over a million people were killed in the siege of Jerusalem in AD70.

Jesus wept then and I imagine he still weeps now.

There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.

God’s ways are not our ways.

The Pharisees of Jesus’ day believed strongly that their way was the right way. They genuinely thought all their rules, which acted like a fence around the Law, were pleasing to God. But their way led to death.

Throughout the gospels Jesus challenged the Pharisees and religious leaders. Jesus called them out on their self-righteousness and hypocrisy saying things like…

Woe to you Pharisees, because you give a tenth of your mint, rue and all other kinds of garden herbs, but you neglect justice and the love of God. You should have practiced the latter without leaving the former undone.

Also, “… you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness…”

This tells us something about the way of life that pleases God. It tells us God is pleased with justice and generosity. It tells us God is pleased when religion is based on love for him and our neighbour. It tells us God does not like it when people use religion as a way to hide evil. True religion, true faith, true spirituality needs to come from the inside out. 

It wasn’t just the Pharisees who got it wrong. Even Jesus’ disciples, his closest friends, misunderstood God’s ways at times.  

In Matthew 16 we read what happened when Peter thought he knew best…

21 From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.

22 Peter took Jesus aside and began to rebuke him. “Never, Lord!” he said. “This shall never happen to you!”

Simon Peter meant well. It seemed right to him that Jesus should not suffer. But Peter was well off track.  

23 Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”

This must have hurt. Imagine thinking you were doing something good, only to be told by Jesus himself that you are aligned with Satan, the one opposed to God’s purpose. The strength of Jesus’ response to Peter mirrors the seriousness of Peter’s error.

24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. 25 For whoever wants to save their lifewill lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.

We may have heard those words so many times they wash over us without penetrating our heart. But Jesus’ message here is shocking. This is a slap in the face, a reality check.

Picking up your cross is a metaphor for suffering in very real ways. To carry a cross in Roman times was to face pain, shame and death. No one wanted to be crucified. No one thought, ‘Oh, carrying a cross, that seems right and good to me. Let’s do that’.

Jesus’ words are counter intuitive, they turn our thinking upside down. Jesus inverts traditional wisdom. Traditional wisdom says, ‘choose the line of least resistance’. Picking up your cross and following Jesus, is the opposite of that.     

The apostle Paul put it in similar terms when he talked about offering your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God for this is your spiritual act of worship.  

The point is, serving God’s purpose, following Jesus’ way, is not an easy or glorious experience. It is difficult. It will cost you.

As a Christian you probably won’t have to literally carry a cross or be flogged or nailed to a tree, like Jesus was. But there will be times when obeying Jesus in faith makes you feel uncomfortable, frustrated, vulnerable and powerless. You will look foolish at times. You will be misunderstood. You will lose and you will wonder what the point is.  

Not that it’s all bad. There are also times when serving Jesus feels like a good fit and a privilege. But the values of God’s kingdom are so different from the values of this world that staying loyal to God’s values will inevitably result in personal suffering. The good news is, if you share in Christ’s sufferings, you will (one day) share in his glory.

Not that glory will matter to you by then. In the end you won’t be interested in glory. You won’t care what other people think. You will simply want Christ to hold you.

In Matthew 5, Jesus gives us the beatitudes. The beatitudes spell out what the right way looks like. What we notice about the beatitudes is the ‘right way’ does not always seem right at first. The beatitudes could be summarised like this: ‘There is a way that does not seem right to a man, but in the end it leads to life’.

For example: Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

To be poor in spirit is to be emotionally depleted, at the end of your rope, weak and vulnerable, like you have been emptied of your courage and motivation. No one chooses to be poor in spirit. No one says, ‘I think I will be poor in spirit today because that seems right to me’. Being poor in spirit is something that circumstance forces on you.

Jesus said you are blessed or lucky if you are poor in spirit because being poor in spirit is a pathway to the kingdom of heaven. Being poor in spirit means you are aware of your need for God and willing to depend on him because you have nothing else.

Another example from the beatitudes of what the right way looks like.

Jesus said: Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

In order to be merciful, you have to be in a position of power in relation to someone else. The merciful are those who use their power to save or help others, as opposed to ignoring or oppressing others. Mercy might mean forgiving a debt or lifting someone out of a hole (literally or metaphorically). 

Mercy, therefore, is a choice. Jesus is saying that the measure you use for others is the measure God will use for you. If you show mercy to others, God will show mercy to you.

Showing mercy usually feels like a sacrifice. Showing mercy will cost you and so it is not easy to show mercy. Forgiving someone may not seem right, when what you really want is revenge. But, as right as revenge might feel in the moment, it leads to death. Mercy, on the other hand, leads to life for you.   

We don’t have to time to go through all the beatitudes now. You can study them yourself later, if you want to know the way that does not seem right, but in the end leads to life.

Suffice to say that when it comes to discerning the right way, we need to look to Jesus. Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. Jesus is our best external point of reference when it comes to measuring decisions. Jesus’ example embodies the way we need to take.

May the Lord bless you and guide you by the light of his presence in all the decisions you make, large and small. Amen.

Questions for discussion or reflection:

What stands out for you in reading these Scriptures and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?

  • Discuss / reflect on the meaning of Proverbs 16:25. ‘There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death’. 
  • Can you think of a time when you (or someone else) did what seemed right, but it ended badly? What happened?
  • What did Jesus mean by the broad road and the narrow road, in Matthew 7:13-14?
  • How can we know if we are on the right path? What are some external points of reference we can use to check if the way we are choosing is actually right? What do we know about the way that pleases God?
  • How do the beatitudes in Matthew 5 inform (and challenge) our understanding of the right way?
  • Why do we need to include Jesus in our decision making? How might we do this? 
Tawa Baptist

A Gentle Answer

Scripture: Proverbs 15:1; 1 Samuel 25; John 8:1-11

Video Link: https://youtu.be/_5yRXjKYZPU

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • A gentle answer
  • Abigail’s answer
  • Jesus’ answer
  • Sometimes wrath prevails
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

Did you know that ‘words’ (w.o.r.d.s.) is an anagram for sword?

Putting the s at the front turns ‘words’ into a sword.

They say the pen is mightier than the sword. Words are powerful things.

Today we continue our series in the book of Proverbs. Proverbs contains wisdom for getting through this life. Proverbs has lots to say about words. Our message today focuses on chapter 15, verse 1, which reads…

A gentle answer:

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

This proverb is basically saying, words and the tone (or manner) in which we say them, have the power to calm a situation or make it worse.

We cannot control what other people might be feeling in the first instance, but we can control how we respond, and our response can have a profound effect on the outcome. 

A gentle answer may seem simple enough but it’s actually quite difficult to do, especially in the heat of the moment. Four things to keep in mind…

Firstly, gentleness requires backbone. A backbone lends strength and flexibility to the body. Being gentle does not mean being a push over or a jelly fish. Gentle is not weak. Gentleness requires the strength to stand your ground and the agility to adapt to change.

Secondly, a gentle answer requires logic. Gentle is not emotional. A gentle response involves keeping your composure and speaking sense. There is a time to express emotion but too much emotion tends to get in the way of a gentle answer.   

Some people are naturally empathic in the sense that they quite quickly and intuitively pick up on what other people are feeling. This is both a gift and a curse. On the one hand it helps you to read the situation and understand what you are dealing with.

But if the other person’s emotion bleeds into yours, then it becomes very difficult to keep yourself calm. If you are naturally sensitive to other people’s feelings, you can end up on the emotional roller coaster with them.

Giving a gentle answer requires you to hold on to yourself and not be overwhelmed. You need to read what the other person is feeling without getting sucked into the vortex of their emotion. You have to turn your own feelings off and think rationally in that moment.

You might say to yourself something like, ‘That person is angry and their anger belongs to them. It does not belong to me. I will stay calm and keep breathing. What is the outcome I want in this situation? And what are the logical steps to achieving that outcome?’       

A third thing to keep in mind, if you want to give a gentle answer, is finding common ground. You don’t have to agree with everything the other person is saying or doing but try and identify what you do agree on. Finding common ground enables you to build a connection.

One thing that gets in the way of finding common ground is the ego. You have to put your ego aside if you want to give a gentle answer. As long as you are focused on defending your ego, you won’t be able to find common ground.

A gentle answer requires backbone, logic, common ground and, fourthly, freedom. A gentle answer allows the person you are dealing with to make a free choice. By definition, gentleness does not threaten or coerce or manipulate in any way. A gentle answer presents the other party with a sensible option, not a blunt ultimatum.

There is a fifth thing required for a gentle answer and that is grace. Each of us has a certain amount of grace in the bank account of our soul. This balance of grace is like the currency we spend in dealing with the difficulties of life. Whenever something bad happens, like we become ill or we don’t get enough sleep or someone is unkind or unfair, or whatever, it costs us a little grace.

Likewise, when you are faced with an angry person, giving a gentle answer will require you to make a withdrawal from your grace account.

We need to keep an eye on how much grace we have left in our account. If you are running low, do something to take care of yourself so your balance of grace is topped up and you have the resources you need to manage yourself in a challenging situation.    

A gentle answer will cost you, but not as much as a harsh word. 

Abigail:

There’s a woman in the Bible who had the grace to give a gentle answer and turn away wrath. Her name is Abigail. In the book of First Samuel chapter 25, David (who is on the run from Saul) finds himself in the desert of Maon.

He and his men, as many as 600 soldiers, needed to eat. There was a rich man in that area by the name of Nabal. David sends some of his men to Nabal to ask if Nabal can help out with any supplies. Afterall, David’s men have provided security for Nabal by protecting his flocks.

But Nabal spoke harshly to David’s men, and he insulted David saying…

“Who is this David? Who is this son of Jesse? Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days. Why should I take my bread and water and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers and give it to men from who knows where?”

Nabal’s response here shows a lack of grace and a large amount of ego. Nabal is no jelly fish; he is no push over. But he doesn’t have backbone either. A backbone combines strength with flexibility. Nabal is more like a brick wall, hard, brittle, inflexible. 

Nabal was not a wise man. Everyone in Israel knows who David is. David is the one who killed Goliath. David is a national hero, anointed by Samuel to be the next king. The smart thing to do was get on David’s good side.

When David’s men reported back to him, David told them to strap on their swords and he marched off with 400 soldiers to teach Nabal a lesson. David was angry and he did not intend to keep any prisoners.  

In the meantime, one of Nabal’s servants had a quiet word with Nabal’s wife, Abigail. The servant told Abigail how Nabal had hurled insults at David’s men even though David’s men had been good to them.

“Night and day they were a wall around us [protecting us] all the time we were herding sheep near them. 17 Please think this over and decide what to do. This could be disastrous for our master and all his family.” He is so mean that he won’t listen to anybody!”

Abigail didn’t need long to think about it. 18 She quickly gathered two hundred loaves of bread, two leather bags full of wine, five roasted sheep, two bushels of roasted grain, a hundred bunches of raisins, and two hundred cakes of dried figs, and loaded them on donkeys. 19 Then she said to the servants, “You go on ahead and I will follow you.” But she said nothing to her husband…

Abigail understood that a gentle answer was going to cost her, but not nearly as much as her husband’s harsh answer would cost them if she did not intervene.

20 Abigail was riding her donkey around a bend on a hillside when suddenly she met David and his men coming toward her. 23 When Abigail saw David, she quickly dismounted and threw herself on the ground 24 at David’s feet, and said to him, “Please, sir, listen to me! Let me take the blame. 25 Please, don’t pay any attention to Nabal, that good-for-nothing! He is exactly what his name means—a fool! I wasn’t there when your servants arrived, sir. 27 Please, sir, accept this present I have brought you, and give it to your men. 28 Please forgive me, sir, for any wrong I have done…

Nabal had reacted to David’s friendliness with arrogance and scorn. Now Abigail, responds wisely to David’s anger with humility and gentleness.

Notice though that a gentle response is not a weak response. There is real courage, real strength, real backbone in Abigail’s action here. Put yourself in her shoes for a moment. Abigail was facing 400 angry men and she was saying, ‘Let me take the blame’. 

Although Abigail has done nothing wrong, she offers to take the blame in order to save her household. This is a picture of grace. This reminds us of what Jesus did on the cross.

Notice too the way Abigail finds common ground with David. Abigail agrees with David that Nabal is a fool. She is wisely establishing a connection and acknowledging that David has every right to feel offended. At the same time, she is also putting distance between herself and Nabal.

To her credit, Abigail doesn’t burst into tears or allow herself to be overwhelmed by emotion. Rather, Abigail sets her gentle answer on the firm foundation of reason and logic. Abigail appeals to David’s conscience, his better nature. From verse 30 she says… 

30 And when the Lord has done all the good things he has promised you and has made you king of Israel, 31 then you will not have to feel regret or remorse, sir, for having killed without cause or for having taken your own revenge…”

This is wise. Abigail gently points out to David the logical outcome if he shows mercy. But she does it in such a way that David still has a choice. Abigail does not threaten David or try to force his hand in any way. She points out to David the benefit of showing mercy (you will be free from regret) and leaves the decision with him. Abigail gives David freedom.

Abigail’s gentle words turned David’s wrath away. The king accepted Abigail’s gift and did not carry out his revenge.

Jesus:

We are talking about how a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  Jesus was a master at the art of the gentle answer. In the gospel of John, chapter 8, we read…

2 At dawn Jesus appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

The whole thing is a set up. We know the woman has been set up because it takes two people to commit adultery and the man isn’t there. The law said both the man and the woman should be stoned, not just the woman.

Primarily though, the Pharisees are trying to set Jesus up. If Jesus says, ‘Stone her’, then he gets in trouble with the Romans and if he says, ‘Don’t stone her’, he can be accused of breaking the law of Moses. 

Jesus is faced with a crowd, most of whom are either angry or confused. What does he do? Well, he holds onto himself. He does not let the anger or malice of his adversaries bleed into his soul or overwhelm his judgment. Jesus exercises the strength of self-control and says nothing at first. Instead…  

Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

Jesus’ response is gentle. It is not harsh or emotional. His response is courageous and rational. Jesus does not beg for mercy for the woman. Nor does he try to appease the Pharisees. Jesus doesn’t say, ‘Let me take the blame’, like we might expect.

No. Jesus finds common ground and he uses logic. The law is the common ground. Yes, the law does prescribe the death penalty for adultery. But, before you start throwing stones, think about the outcome for yourself if you do kill her. You will find it hard to live with yourself, knowing you also have sinned and deserve the same punishment. Jesus’ logic is clear. 

There is no coercion, no threat and no manipulation in Jesus’ gentle answer. Jesus leaves the decision with each individual and their conscience. The people are free to choose.

9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”

Jesus was gentle but firm with the Pharisees who were trying to trap him and he was gentle but firm with the woman too. Gentle does not mean weak. Jesus does not condemn the woman but nor does he condone adultery. Jesus shows back bone. Strength with flexibility.

Jesus makes a withdrawal of grace from his own personal account and deposits it in the woman’s account, not so she can carry on as she has been. But rather so she can make a fresh start in right relationship with others.   

Backbone, logic, common ground, freedom and grace. All these are on display with Jesus’ gentle answer.

Sometimes wrath prevails:

That being said, it must also be acknowledged that a gentle answer does not always turn away wrath. It did for Jesus in John 8 and it did for Abigail in Samuel 25. But there are times when no amount of gentleness will do.

When Jesus was made to stand trial before the Jewish council, the Lord did nothing to provoke their anger. Jesus stood his ground and responded with gentleness and reason, grace and truth.  

When one of the guards struck Jesus on the face, the Lord answered not with emotion but with logic, saying, ‘If I said something wrong, testify to what is wrong. But if I spoke the truth, why did you strike me?’ 

And, when Jesus stood before the Roman governor and Pilate said, ‘Don’t you realise I have the power either to free you or crucify you?’ Jesus answered with logic and grace, ‘You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above. Therefore, the one who handed me over to you is guilty of a greater sin.’

Jesus’ gentle answer convinced Pilate that Jesus was innocent. From then on Pilate tried to set Jesus free but the anger of the Jews prevailed and Jesus went to the cross.  

Even while he was hanging on the cross, bleeding out, thirsty, exhausted, in agony, with insults ringing in his ears, Jesus still managed a gentle answer: ‘Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.’

A gentle answer turns away wrath, most of the time, but not always. This life is not necessarily fair.

Conclusion:  

We are not likely to find ourselves in an extreme, life-threatening situation like Abigail or Jesus, for which we can be thankful.

But we may still be ambushed by a petulant child or a surly teenager. We may have to deal with an unreasonable adult or a grumpy husband or wife. And there may be times when people who do not know us that well, dump their prejudice on us.

Those moments often come without warning when we are feeling tired and otherwise distracted. We may not always be well equipped with the grace or the strength or the presence of mind we need to give a gentle answer.

Sometimes we will manage to hold on to ourselves and not be overwhelmed by the weight of someone else’s emotion. Other times our ego might get the better of us so that we seek to justify ourselves and respond more harshly than we would have liked. 

Try to have the same grace for yourself that you do for others. It does no good to get stuck in a cycle of feeling guilty and beating yourself up whenever you fall short of your ideals.

We can be our own worst enemy. Sometimes we end up shadowboxing with ourselves. Sometimes we need to speak a gentle answer to our own inner critic. 

Remember too, there may be times when a gentle answer is not called for. There may be times when it is better to give no answer and simply walk away from an angry person, give them a chance to cool down.

This is particularly relevant when communicating on social media. Best not to engage a keyboard warrior.

Life is messy. Sometimes we get it right. Sometimes we make the mess worse. None of us is perfect. We look to Jesus to be our wisdom and our righteousness, knowing that …he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Christ our Lord. Amen.

Questions for discussion or reflection:

What stands out for you in reading these Scriptures and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?

  • Can you think of a time (in your own experience) when you observed a gentle answer turning away wrath? What happened?
  • Why is it necessary to keep emotion at arms’ length when giving a gentle answer? What can we do to hold onto ourselves and not be overwhelmed by emotion in the heat of the moment?
  • What is your ‘grace balance’ like at present? Are you running low on grace? What can you do, over the next few days or weeks, to top up your grace balance?
  • Discuss / reflect on Abigail’s gentle answer in 1st Samuel 25. How did Abigail find common ground with David? What logic did Abigail use to turn away David’s wrath?
  • Discuss / reflect on Jesus’ gentle answer in John 8:1-11. What common ground did Jesus find with his adversaries in this situation? How did Jesus use logic and freedom to turn away wrath?
  • What can we do when a gentle answer does not turn away wrath? What can we do when we fail to give a gentle answer? When is a gentle answer not appropriate?