Tawa Baptist

Wedded to Wisdom

Scripture: Proverbs 31:10-31

Video Link: https://youtu.be/kEbqD1U8ugQ

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • Wonder Woman, or
  • Wisdom Woman
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Good morning everyone.

If someone says to you, ‘His head is in the clouds’, they don’t literally mean that his head is high in the air floating around in the mist. They are using picture language to convey the idea that he is day dreaming.

Likewise, if someone says to you, ‘I feel like a pizza’, you know they are not talking about feeling hot and cheesy. They are speaking figuratively. They are saying, I feel like eating a pizza.

And if someone says, ‘I worked my socks off’, they don’t mean their socks literally came off while they were working. They mean I worked really hard.

Today we continue our series in the book of Proverbs. Much of Proverbs is poetry. It uses metaphor or picture language to convey ideas. Because Proverbs uses picture language you cannot take everything at face value. If what you are reading doesn’t make sense literally, then think figuratively. 

This morning’s message focuses on a poem at the end Proverbs. In the original Hebrew this is an alphabetical acrostic poem which means each line of the poem begins with the next letter of the Hebrew alphabet.

An English acrostic might go something like, she is Admirable, she is Beautiful, she is Clever, she is Discerning, she is Empathic and so on. 

Some readers see this as the A to Z of being the ideal wife because, if we read it literally, the poem seems to describe a kind of Wonder Woman with superpowers for doing housework, raising children, making money, helping the poor, giving wise advice and making her husband successful. 

If we read this poem metaphorically though, it is not talking about who you marry. It’s talking about wisdom. It’s saying, whoever you are, whether you are male or female, single or in a relationship, make wisdom your partner for life. Wisdom is the ideal help mate. From Proverbs 31, verse 10 we read…

10 How hard it is to find a capable wife! She is worth far more than jewels! 11 Her husband puts his confidence in her, and he will never be poor. 12 As long as she lives, she does him good and never harm. 13 She keeps herself busy making wool and linen cloth. 14 She brings home food from out-of-the-way places, as merchant ships do. 15 She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and to tell her servant women what to do. 16 She looks at land and buys it, and with money she has earned she plants a vineyard. 17 She is a hard worker, strong and industrious. 18 She knows the value of everything she makes, and works late into the night. 19 She spins her own thread and weaves her own cloth. 20 She is generous to the poor and needy. 21 She doesn’t worry when it snows, because her family has warm clothing. 22 She makes bedspreads and wears clothes of fine purple linen. 23 Her husband is well known, one of the leading citizens. 24 She makes clothes and belts, and sells them to merchants. 25 She is strong and respected and not afraid of the future. 26 She speaks with a gentle wisdom. 27 She is always busy and looks after her family’s needs. 28 Her children show their appreciation, and her husband praises her. 29 He says, “Many women are good wives, but you are the best of them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive and beauty disappears, but a woman who honours the Lord should be praised. 31 Give her credit for all she does. She deserves the respect of everyone.

May the Spirit of Jesus illuminate God’s word for us.

As I said earlier, there are basically two ways to understand this poem at the end of Proverbs, literally or metaphorically. Is the poem describing an actual human being, the ideal Wonder Woman that every man should aspire to marry?

Or is the poem describing wisdom herself, so the capable wife is not an actual human being but a metaphor personifying wisdom from God? Let’s starts by exploring a literal interpretation.

Wonder Woman:

We might summarise the qualities of the wife described in Proverbs 31 with the following C’s: character, commitment, capability, compassion and confidence. 

She is a woman of noble character (verse 10). Character has to do with virtue. Things like, honesty, faithfulness, courage and so on. Good character creates and maintains trust and trust is the foundation of any relationship.

Another important quality necessary for any long-term relationship is commitment. As Abraham Lincoln said, ‘Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality’.

Verse 12 says this wonder woman does good to her husband as long as she lives. That’s real commitment.  

There are times in a marriage when it is simply hard graft because of circumstances outside of your control. There are times when you just have to grit your teeth and commit yourself to getting through the tough stuff together.

The wife described in Proverbs 31 is a capable woman, meaning she has skills in working with her hands (verse 19) and in making good business decisions (verse 16). But she also has the capacity and the strength to work her socks off and get the job done (verse 17).

Verse 13 says, she keeps herself busy making wool & linen cloth. The original Hebrew text does not actually say ‘busy’. It literally translates ‘pleasure of her hands’ (or ‘eager hands’), meaning she enjoys working. Creative work is not drudgery to her. [1]

She is compassionate, opening her arms to the poor and helping the needy (verse 20). There is wisdom in taking care of those less fortunate in your neighbourhood. If you do, they are more likely to take care of you and your family when it is in their power to do so.      

Verse 26 shows us another aspect of her compassion. She speaks with gentle wisdom. The idea here is that she has just the right word in season. Truth with grace. She knows how to turn away wrath with a gentle word. 

Verse 21 tells us she is confident, not a worrier. She is not anxious about her household because she is prepared. Confidence is contagious. This wonder woman inspires confidence in others.

Most people are attracted to a partner by charm or beauty. But charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting. So, if you are looking for a marriage partner then competence, commitment, capability, compassion and confidence are all helpful qualities to keep in mind.

One quality that is conspicuous by its absence, in Proverbs 31, is compatibility. Compatibility has to do with how easily you get along. You want your partner in marriage to have a personality that fits with yours and doesn’t grate. You want to have the same values and be heading in the same direction, otherwise life will quickly become a grind.

A literal reading of Proverbs 31 paints a picture of a woman who is high performance and low maintenance. It is hard to imagine anyone living up to the standard set by this poem though. It seems a bit unreal, sort of like the Cosby Show – trying to hold up an ideal that is often divorced from the reality of everyday experience.

There are perhaps only three women in the entire Bible who come close to fitting the description of the wife in Proverbs 31…

Ruth probably fits the ideal best. She honours her first husband after he dies by looking after her mother-in-law and finding a relative of her husband to marry and provide an heir.

She works extremely hard, is good with her hands and demonstrates wisdom and loyalty, so much so that Boaz (a man of standing in the community) marries her and praises her. Indeed, she is praised by everyone in the community who say she is better than seven sons.

Abigail is another (almost) example of the Proverbs 31 wife. She is an astute business-woman who manages her household well. However, her first husband seems to take her for granted and she doesn’t have a great deal of respect for him either.

Looking at the New Testament; Lydia (possibly) approximates the ideal woman.

I’m not sure what her marital status was but Lydia was a wealthy trader in purple cloth, she honoured God and she provided for the apostles.

The point is this wonder woman of Proverbs 31 is hard to find even in the Bible. So how realistic is it for us to read this passage in a literal way? Because a literal reading seems to exclude most women…

It excludes single women and women who cannot have children.

It excludes women who can’t sew or cook. 

It excludes women whose children have gone off the rails.

It excludes women who don’t work outside the home.

It excludes women whose husbands share the domestic duties because she does work outside the home. It excludes women who don’t have servants.  

And it excludes women whose husband or children take them for granted.

It basically excludes any woman who needs more than 4 hours sleep a day.  

Apparently, some Jewish men used to recite this poem to their wives on Sabbath evenings. [2] If we give them the benefit of the doubt it was perhaps a gesture of their love and appreciation. A way of saying, ‘I see all that you do for our family’.  

But I imagine there were some weeks when the woman did not appreciate it – like she was being reminded of all the ways she did not measure up.

And this is one of the dangers with reading Proverbs 31 in a literal way. Girls might think this is how I should be. This is my duty or else I fail and am not worthy.  

The other danger with reading Proverbs 31 literally is that boys might think this is how my wife is supposed to be. She is supposed to do everything for me and the kids. Then there is disappointment when she does not live up to his expectations.

Ladies, if you try to live up to this, then you are just going to wear yourself out and you will probably end up alienating your husband for all your efforts. When I look at Proverbs 31 from a literal perspective, I find myself asking, ‘When do this couple ever spend any time together?’

She is so busy doing things apart from him that there is not much opportunity for companionship or intimacy in their relationship.

It’s like the chorus line in that song by The Chainsmokers and Coldplay. I’m not looking for somebody with some superhuman gifts, some superhero, some fairy tale bliss. I just want someone I can turn to, somebody I can kiss.

So, is there anything redeemable from a literal reading of this poem?

Well, yes. On the positive side we see a woman who is empowered and trusted by her husband. She has freedom and independence to use her initiative, to buy land and trade.

We could view this as quite enlightened for its time. It’s sort of a ‘women can anything’ text centuries before that became fashionable. It also shows men they don’t need to feel threatened or insecure if their wife is more competent than they are.   

The poem finishes by saying, a woman who honours the Lord should be praised. Give her credit for all she does. She deserves the respect of everyone.

This can be taken literally. Here we see a man who appreciates his wife and does not take her for granted. Men, don’t wait for your wife or mother or sister to meet some perfect ideal before you say good things to her.

Express your appreciation with words and with listening. Say it by helping with the kids and the housework. Say it by taking her out to a nice restaurant. Say it anyway that she can hear it, as long as the message is ‘I love and appreciate you’.

Wisdom Woman:

Okay, so a literal reading of the text can offer some helpful advice, but it also comes with some hooks. On the whole it is probably more helpful (and truer to the context) to understand the woman in Proverbs 31, not as a literal human being, but rather as a metaphor personifying wisdom.

Personification is when we give human characteristics to something that is not human. For example, in A.A. Milne’s stories of Winnie the Pooh – Pooh Bear has a friend called ‘Owl’. Owl is a personification of wisdom, just as Eeyore personifies melancholy and Piglet personifies loyalty.   

In a similar vein the writer of Proverbs 31 personifies wisdom, giving the abstract concept of wisdom, human characteristics.

As Kathleen O’Connor writes…

Rather than supplying the image of the correct marriage partner the poem [in Proverbs 31] serves as a summary of the whole Book of Proverbs. Its central character is no typical woman but the Wisdom Woman herself… this poem demonstrates what life is like once one has chosen to live with wisdom. [3]

In other words, the poem in Proverbs 31 is not suggesting that human wives need to wear themselves out trying to attain an impossible ideal. It is saying that men and women should intentionally seek wisdom like they would look for a marriage partner.

We should love wisdom, live with wisdom, sleep with wisdom, make a lifetime commitment to wisdom. Because then we (and our families) will enjoy all wisdom’s benefits.  

If we read Proverbs 31 metaphorically this is what it might sound like…

Verse 10 – How hard it is to find wisdom. She is worth far more than jewels.

This echoes Proverbs 8, where wisdom speaks as a woman saying…  

Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Verse 11 – The man who puts his confidence in wisdom will never be poor.

(As opposed to the man who puts his confidence in luck or dishonest gain.)

As long as she lives wisdom does him good and never harm.

Verses 13 & 14 – Wisdom works with eager hands. Wisdom brings home food from out of the way places. Wisdom gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family…

In other words, a wise man works to provide for his family. He doesn’t wait for things to fall into his lap. He doesn’t waste time doing busy work that bears little or no fruit. He enjoys working for a meaningful purpose, putting food on the table for the people he loves.

Verse 16 – Wisdom looks at land (she considers it first without rushing into a decision) then she buys it, and with money she has earned wisdom plants a vineyard.

This is like saying, a wise man does not leave his land lying unproductive. A wise man puts what he has to good use. Verse 16 is talking about stewardship.

Verses 17 & 18 – Wisdom is a hard worker, strong and industrious. Wisdom works late into the night.

This does not mean burning the candle at both ends or becoming a workaholic. That is not wisdom.

It could mean, a wise decision will go on working for you through the night, so you can sleep and have peace.

But it might also mean, if you have a problem to solve or a difficult decision to make, then often the wisest thing to do is sleep on it. As you sleep, wisdom does its work so when you wake in the morning the way forward is clearer.

The main point is that wisdom enables you to work smarter, so you don’t have to work harder.

Verse 20 – Wisdom is generous to the poor and needy.

In other words, it is wise to show practical compassion to those who are less fortunate. Better to have the poor on your side than to have them cursing you or worse.  

Verse 23 – Wisdom’s husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

The city gate, in ancient times, was sort of like the local council and court room. It was a place where the leaders of the city gathered to make community decisions.

When a man is wedded to wisdom, he earns respect and influence in the community. He is listened to.

We could go on, but you get the point. When we read Proverbs 31 metaphorically, thinking of the capable wife not as an actual human being but as Wisdom personified, then it takes on a whole new meaning.

Conclusion:

As I keep saying throughout this series, Jesus is the personification of God’s wisdom (both literally and metaphorically). Jesus embodies wisdom.

Jesus came that we might have abundant life. The yoke of Jesus’ wisdom is easy, meaning it fits us perfectly. And his burden is light, meaning he does not ask us to carry the weight of unrealistic expectations.  

When we make a lifetime commitment to following Jesus, we find wisdom.  

May God grant you a long and happy union with wisdom. Amen. 

Questions for discussion or reflection:

  1. What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon? Why do you think this stood out to you?
  • How do you feel when you read Proverbs 31:10-31 literally? How do you feel when you read this same passage metaphorically?
  • What are the difficulties in reading Proverbs 31:10-31 literally? What parts can be read literally?
  • What sort of qualities are important to you in a long-term relationship? (E.g. marriage or friendship.)
  • How does the meaning of verses 17 & 18 change when read metaphorically? That is, Wisdom is a hard worker, strong and industrious. Wisdom works late into the night. 
  • How does Proverbs 31 point to Jesus?

[1] Graeme Goldsworthy, ‘Proverbs The Tree of Life’, page 163.

[2] Paul E. Koptak, NIVAC Proverbs, page 675

[3] Cited in Alice Ogden Bellis’ book ‘Helpmates, Harlots and Heroes’, page 198.

Tawa Baptist

Healing in Ruth

Scripture: Ruth

Title: Healing

Structure:

  • Introduction
  • Ruth 1
  • Ruth 2
  • Ruth 3
  • Ruth 4
  • Conclusion

Introduction:

Aristotle is quoted as saying, “The whole is greater than the sum of its parts”

–         The idea here is of synergy or working together

–         Said another way, the interaction or cooperation of two or more parts produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate effects.

 

For example, if you take a raw egg by itself then it doesn’t taste that nice

–         Yes, you can eat it and it will give you some nutritional benefit but it’s not that appetising

–         Likewise if you take some flour by itself it’s barely edible

–         But when you combine the egg & flour with some other ingredients, like sugar and butter and cocoa powder, then put it in the oven to cook, the whole cake that comes out is far nicer to eat than each separate ingredient on its own

 

Today we conclude our series on care of the soul, using the acronym HEALING

–         Over the past couple of months or so we have looked at how Hope Energy Appreciation Lament Inter-dependence Nurture & Giving support the well-being of the soul

–         For the sake of understanding we have looked at each word separately but actually these seven parts work together in an inter-related way

–         There is synergy between them so that when we put them together the whole is greater than the sum of its parts

–         Hope is a primary source of energy and inspires both appreciation and lament

o   When hope is fulfilled appreciation is the right response

o   Likewise, when hope is disappointed, lament is the natural response

–         Hope also provides the energy for nurture & giving, which in turn provide the oil for inter-dependent relationships

 

One Biblical story which shows all seven of these things working together is the story of Ruth & Naomi

 

Ruth 1

The book of Ruth is set during the time of the Judges in Israel – so that’s after the people have entered the Promised Land, but before kings were appointed – around the time of Samson and Gideon, give or take

 

Because of a famine Naomi leaves Bethlehem with her husband and two sons and migrates to Moab

–         The Moabites were sort of like cousins to the Israelites but they didn’t really get on all that well

–         The Moabites were descended from Abraham’s nephew Lot, who had an incestuous relationship with his daughters

–         Things must have been pretty grim for Naomi’s husband to think that Moab offered greener pastures

–         Anyway, while they are away in Moab Naomi’s husband died and her two sons married Moabite girls, Orpah & Ruth

–         About 10 years pass and then Naomi’s two sons die as well – it’s a complete disaster from Naomi’s point of view

–         There was no widow’s benefit or DPB, no state housing and not many options for single women in that context

 

Naomi hears there has been a good crop back in Israel so she says goodbye to Orpah & Ruth, and starts to head back to her home town of Bethlehem

–         But Orpah & Ruth want to go with Naomi – apparently they are not as bad as their chequered ancestry would make them seem

–         Naomi then makes a big speech about how her situation is hopeless, because she is too old to get married again, and if they stay with her their situation will be hopeless too

–         Orpah returns to Moab but Ruth insists on staying with Naomi saying…

 

“Don’t ask me to leave you! Let me go with you. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Where you die, I will die, and that is where I will be buried.

 

Ruth was committed to Naomi until death do us part, so Naomi let Ruth come with her. Ruth’s presence and promise to Naomi is the catalyst for hope

–         Ruth & Naomi together are greater than the sum of Ruth & Naomi apart

 

But Naomi can’t see that just yet – when she returns to Israel Naomi tells people to call her ‘Marah’ because Naomi means pleasant, whereas Marah means bitter

–         Why call me Naomi when the Lord Almighty has condemned me and sent me trouble

–         To feel condemned by God is to believe that nothing good waits for you in the future – condemnation is the opposite of hope

–         Hopelessness (despair) is a form of blindness – a loss of perspective

–         Yes, Naomi has been on the receiving end of trouble but it doesn’t automatically follow that God has condemned her

–         At this point Naomi fails to see the good that God has provided in the form of her daughter-in-law Ruth

 

We could say that, Naomi’s behaviour in changing her name and blaming God for her troubles is a form of lament

–         It is because her hope has been disappointed that Naomi feels so bitter

–         Naomi doesn’t deny what she is feeling – she faces it honestly

–         Naomi has lost almost everything and she isn’t ready to forgive God

–         While Naomi is seeking to give honest expression to her grief she is perhaps being unfair in blaming God – better that though than taking it out on the people around you – God’s grace is sufficient for Naomi

–         Interestingly no one in Bethlehem chastises Naomi for her lament

–         They simply listen to her, in silence, and respect how she feels

–         Because really there are no words to do justice to what she is feeling

 

Ruth 2

Hope is not the only source of energy – food is a form of energy too

–         The barley harvest was just beginning when they arrived in Bethlehem so Ruth goes out to glean in the fields behind the harvesters

–         Gleaning means picking up what the harvesters leave behind

 

At its best ancient Israel was an inter-dependent unity

–         People didn’t function independently – the community valued each of its members and relied on each other to provide care & nurture for all

–         Their welfare system was quite different to ours

–         One of the ways the rich provided for the poor was by allowing the poor to glean after the harvesters in their field

–         This was genius really because it allowed the poor the dignity of working for their daily bread and it saved the rich from becoming too greedy

–         The outcome was to nurture better relationships between the rich & poor

–         In our society there is a growing gap between rich & poor, but in the Bethlehem of Naomi’s day the lives of the rich & poor were more closely woven together so they weren’t afraid of each other

 

It so happened that Ruth went to work in the field of Boaz

–         “It so happened” is code for God set this meeting up

 

After enquiring about Ruth with his harvesters, Boaz approaches her with a view to connecting her with the right people in the local community

–         The time of the Judges in Israel was a bit like the wild west – not everyone was as virtuous as Boaz

–         Some people would take advantage of a foreigner like Ruth – they might assume that with her Moabite heritage she would be promiscuous

–         So Boaz invites Ruth to stay with the women in his field and drink from his water jars

–         Boaz is a man of power & influence in the community but he doesn’t see this power and influence as his to do whatever he likes with

–         In Boaz’ mind the whole community is greater than the sum of its individual parts

–         Boaz recognises that his position, his wealth, belongs to God and he is just a steward of it

–         Boaz wisely & generously gives what God has entrusted him with for the benefit of the poor and marginalised, like Ruth & Naomi

 

However, Boaz does this in a way that genuinely appreciates Ruth’s character

–         He doesn’t patronise her or make her feel small in any way

–         “I have heard about everything that you have done for your mother-in-law since your husband died. I know how you left your father and mother and your own country and how you came to live among a people you had never known before. May the Lord reward you for what you have done.”

–         Ruth is an unlikely heroine – most people wouldn’t expect her to show this level of loyalty and care to Naomi

–         Boaz is making it clear that both he and the Lord appreciate Ruth’s faith and love – they see past the prejudice and beneath the superficial things to recognise the inner quality of her heart  

 

Appreciation begets appreciation. Ruth says to Boaz…

–         “You are very kind to me sir. You have made me feel better by speaking gently to me…”

 

When Ruth comes home with lots of grain and Naomi learns that Ruth has been gleaning in Boaz’ field, Naomi expresses her appreciation too saying…

–         “May the Lord bless Boaz. The Lord always keeps his promises to the living and the dead. That man is a close relative of ours, one of those responsible for taking care of us.”

–         This is a remarkable change of tune from Naomi

–         For the first time in this story she sounds a note of hope – she imagines a future in which she & Ruth are not condemned but rather redeemed

You see, in ancient Israel, hope was provided for through the law in a number of ways

–         For example, if someone fell on hard times financially, and had to sell their land, or themselves into slavery, then a close family member (known as a ‘kinsman redeemer’) was obligated under the law to redeem them by buying their land and their freedom

–         Likewise, if a husband died then that man’s brother or closest male relative was obligated to marry the widow, both to provide a home for the woman and to give the woman (and her late husband) an heir, a son

–         It wasn’t a good deal, financially, for the bloke who had to marry his dead brother’s widow, but it provided something more valuable than money

–         It provided security, nurture and hope for the whole community

–         The whole is greater than the sum of its parts

Naomi has hope because the Law of Moses requires Boaz to redeem them

–         And this hope lifts her spirits, it gives her a new found energy and makes it possible for her to imagine a future in which Ruth is married with children and they all live happily ever after

–         The interesting thing about Naomi’s hope is that it isn’t all about Naomi

–         Naomi’s hope and happiness is tied to Ruth’s future in an inter-dependent way

 

Ruth 3

With this new found hope Naomi suggests a daring plan designed to get Boaz to marry Ruth

–         The plan is risky and one wonders why Naomi doesn’t propose a more straight forward plan, but the risk heightens the sense of suspense and makes for a better story I suppose

So Ruth went to the threshing place and did just what her mother-in-law had told her. When Boaz had finished eating and drinking, he was in a good mood. He went to the pile of barley and lay down to sleep. Ruth slipped over quietly, lifted the covers and lay down at his feet. During the night he woke up suddenly, turned over, and was surprised to find a woman lying at his feet.  

“Who are you?” he asked.

“It’s Ruth, sir,” she answered. “Because you are a close relative, you are responsible for taking care of me. So please marry me.”

[Don’t you love the way she proposes to him – it’s brilliant]

“The Lord bless you,” Boaz said. “You are showing even greater family loyalty in what you are doing now than in what you did for your mother-in-law. You might have gone looking for a young man, either rich or poor, but you haven’t. Now don’t worry, Ruth. I will do everything you ask; as everyone in town knows, you are a fine woman.   

 

That expression, ‘family loyalty’ translates from the Hebrew word hesed

–         I’ve talked about hesed before

–         Katherine Sakenfeld gives the best definition I think…

 

Hesed is variously translated as kindness, mercy, faithfulness or loyalty

–         There are three criteria to hesed in the Hebrew Bible:

–         First, the action is essential to the survival or basic well-being of the recipient

–         Second, the needed action is one that only the person doing the act of hesed is in a position to provide

–         And thirdly, an act of hesed takes place within the context of an existing, positive relationship [1]

 

Boaz is commending Ruth for her hesed (or her loyal love) toward Naomi and her late husband

–         In terms of our HEALING acronym hesed relates closely with nurture & giving

 

Ruth showed hesed (or kindness & nurture) to Naomi by sticking with her and taking care of her through thick & thin

–         Without Ruth’s support it is uncertain whether Naomi would have survived – after all it was Ruth who provided food for them both

–         Not only that but Ruth was a comforting companion for Naomi – she saved her mother-in-law from being overwhelmed by loneliness & grief

 

Likewise, Ruth showed generous hesed to her late husband Mahlon by seeking a husband from among Mahlon’s relatives

–         In this way Mahlon’s name would be preserved in Israel

–         If Ruth had gone after a younger man, who wasn’t related to Mahlon, then the child would not be counted as Mahlon’s son or Naomi’s grandson – no one else could give Mahlon a son in this way, only Ruth

Boaz has the insight to truly appreciate Ruth’s nurture & giving and is ready to respond in kind with his own generous nurture of Ruth & Naomi, but first he must negotiate with another kinsman-redeemer who is more closely related than himself

 

Ruth 4

Boaz does everything out in the open and above board – he follows the right process to avoid arguments later

–         At the town gate, in the presence of the elders, Boaz asks the closer kinsman redeemer if he will redeem Naomi’s field (that is, buy it off Naomi so the land stays in the family and Naomi is provided for)

–         At first the man is willing to do this but when he learns that marrying Ruth is part of the deal he pulls out because then the field would belong to any children he has with Ruth – this man isn’t feeling that generous

–         We shouldn’t be too tough on him though – he was simply being honest

–         Ruth would be better off with Boaz because Boaz really appreciated her in a way that the other guy didn’t

–         So Boaz, who is the next closest relative, steps in to redeem the situation by purchasing the field and marrying Ruth

–         Financially it is not in Boaz’ interests to do this but Boaz is thinking of the bigger picture – he is thinking of the community as a whole, not just himself

–         Boaz & Ruth together are greater than the sum of Boaz & Ruth apart

 

Ruth & Boaz are married with the blessing of the community and, by God’s grace, a son is born to Ruth

–         The women of Bethlehem have the last word, saying to Naomi…

“Praise the Lord! He has given you a grandson today to take care of you. May the boy become famous in Israel! Your daughter-in-law loves you, and has done more for you than seven sons. And now she has given you a grandson, who will bring new life to you and give you security in your old age.”

Naomi took the child, held him close, and took care of him.

The women of the neighbourhood named the boy Obed. They told everyone, “A son has been born to Naomi!”

Here we have appreciation, inter-dependence, nurture & giving, altogether, in just a couple of verses

  • – The women express their appreciation in praise to God for the birth of Obed and the loyal love of Ruth
  • – Ruth gives her first born son to Naomi
  • – And Naomi nurtures the child
  • – Inter-dependence is seen in the way the women of the neighbourhood name the boy and rejoice with Naomi
  • – What happens to one part of the body affects the rest – if one part suffers, all the other parts suffer with it and if one part is praised, all the other parts share its happiness
  • – The whole is greater than the sum of its parts

 

Conclusion:

The book of Ruth finishes with a genealogy

  • – Obed became the father of Jesse, who was the father of David
  • – As in, king David – which makes Ruth & Boaz the ancestors of Jesus

The story of Naomi & Ruth is a story of how God heals the broken hearted and the poor in spirit, not through quick miracles but through more ordinary things like time, patience, loyal love and the people we least expect

  • – Hope, Energy, Appreciation, Lament, Inter-dependence, Nurture and Giving, they are all present in the healing process as Naomi goes from emptiness to fullness, from feeling condemned to being redeemed, from death to life, from disorientation to a new orientation

 

Ruth’s promise of hesed to Naomi reminds me of Jesus’ promise to be with us always, wherever we go [2]

Boaz’ action in redeeming Ruth & Naomi also reminds me of Jesus

Jesus, the Son of Man (the Son of Humankind), is our kinsman redeemer

  • – God has the power to take all the fragments, all the broken pieces of your life, and make you whole again
  • – It is the Spirit of Jesus who makes the whole greater than the sum of its parts

 

Questions for discussion or reflection:

1.)    What stands out for you in reading this Scripture and/or in listening to the sermon?

2.)    Can you think of some examples, from everyday life, where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts?

–         Discuss the way the different parts of our H.E.A.L.I.N.G. acronym work together

3.)    What is the significance of Ruth’s promise to Naomi?

–         What difference does this make for both of them?

4.)    Why does Naomi insist on being called Marah, in chapter 1?

–         How is this a form of lament?

5.)    How was the welfare system, operating in the story of Ruth, different from our welfare system today?

–         How did gleaning foster inter-dependence?

–         How does Boaz use his wealth & influence to help the poor & marginalised?

6.)    What does Boaz appreciate about Ruth?

–         How does Boaz express his appreciation for Ruth?

7.)    What are some of the ways the Law of Moses provided hope for people?

8.)    How does Ruth show hesed (loyal love) to Naomi and her late husband Mahlon?

–         How does the concept of hesed relate to our H.E.A.L.I.N.G. acronym?

9.)    In what sense is Jesus our kinsman redeemer?

 

[1] Katherine Doob Sakenfeld, Ruth, page 24.

[2] Matthew 28:20

Tawa Baptist

Naomi & Ruth

Scripture: Ruth 1 & 3

 

Title: Naomi & Ruth

 

Structure:

  • Introduction – unlikely friendship
  • Ruth 1 – Naomi & Ruth’s hesed
  • Ruth 3 – Ruth & Boaz’ hesed
  • Conclusion

 

Introduction:

On the wall here we have a picture of a bird nestled on the belly of a cat

–         This is an unlikely pairing – normally we would expect cats to hunt and kill birds, not give refuge to them

 

Today we continue our sermon series on intergenerational relationships in the Bible

–         An intergenerational relationship is a relationship between two people from different generations, someone older and someone younger

–         We find a number of intergenerational relationships in the Bible

–         For example: Moses and Joshua, who we heard about two weeks ago

–         The aging priest Eli and the young prophet Samuel

–         King Saul and King David

–         As well as the apostle Paul and his protégé Timothy

 

Our focus this morning though is on the relationship between Naomi and her daughter-in-law Ruth

–         Naomi & Ruth’s friendship was as unlikely as that of a cat and a bird

–         They were years apart in age

–         They were from a different ethnic & cultural background – Naomi from Israel and Ruth from Moab

–         They had grown up with a different religion

–         Their nations had been at war (off and on) for many years

–         And, they were mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, which is often (but not always) a relationship fraught with tension or at least distance

 

Despite all these differences though there was real warmth and commitment in their relationship

–         It wasn’t a mentoring relationship as such (like Moses & Joshua)

–         It was more of a mutually caring intergenerational friendship – with both of them looking out for one another’s interests

 

The name Ruth means ‘friend’ or ‘companion’

–         And the name Naomi means ‘sweetness’ or ‘pleasantness’

–         Although they are an unlikely pairing, Naomi and Ruth characterise the ideal inter-generational relationship – one of friendship & companioning, sweetness & pleasantness

 

We don’t have time to cover all four chapters of Ruth this morning

–         I will be focusing mainly on chapters 1 & 3

 

Ruth 1 – Naomi & Ruth’s Hesed:

The story is set during the time of the Judges in ancient Israel – which is after Joshua and before Saul & David

–         In many ways it was the worst of times – but it brought out the best in certain people

–         There was a famine in the land and Naomi’s husband and two sons were forced to leave Bethlehem to try and find food in Moab, the land of their enemies – they were essentially refugees – displaced people

 

While they were in Moab, Naomi’s husband died and her two sons married Moabite girls: Orpah and Ruth. Neither Orpah nor Ruth had any children

 

Ten years passed in Moab before Naomi’s two sons died also

–         There are no words to describe the profoundness of Naomi’s loss

 

When she hears that God has provided food for his people in Israel, Naomi decides to return to Bethlehem with her two daughters-in-law

–         Not long into the journey home Naomi releases Orpah and Ruth from their obligation to her, saying:

 

“Go back, each of you, to your mother’s home. May the Lord show kindness to you, as you have shown to your dead and to me. May the Lord grant that each of you will find rest in the home of another husband.”

 

There weren’t many options for single women in the Ancient Near East – it was a tough world

Although Naomi has suffered the worst kind of loss imaginable, and could well do with the comfort and support of Orpah & Ruth, she puts aside her own need and releases her daughters-in-law

–         Naomi knows she can’t provide for them herself and, having already been married, it will be hard enough for Ruth & Orpah to find another husband among their own people let alone among the men of Israel

–         Going back to Moab is Orpah & Ruth’s best bet, even though it means more loss for Naomi

 

That word ‘kindness’ is hesed in the original Hebrew

–         We don’t really have one single word in English for hesed

–         It is a Jewish term which is sometimes translated as kindness, sometimes as mercy and other times as steadfast love or loyal (covenant) love

–         Hesed isn’t just an abstract concept though – it is an action, something tangible that you do for someone else’s well-being

 

Both Orpah and Ruth had shown hesed to their late husbands, while they were alive, and to Naomi – now Naomi wants to return the favour

 

Katherine Sakenfeld, who did her PhD on this subject, outlines the three main criteria of hesed… [1]

–         Firstly, the action is essential to the survival or the basic wellbeing of the recipient – so it’s not something you do to entertain a whim or a fancy

–         Secondly, the needed action is one that only the person doing the hesed is in a position to provide – given the circumstances no one else can do it

–         And thirdly, hesed takes place in the context of an existing relationship

 

Now an act of hesed can be a relatively small thing or it can be a really big thing

–         Let me give you some examples of hesed – one which is relatively simple and two which are more significant:

 

Imagine you are tucked up in bed one cold winter’s night, enjoying a nice sleep when your cell-phone goes off – you sit up and answer it

–         It’s someone you know from work – what could they want at 2 o’clock in the morning?

–         Well, they’ve been out on the town, it’s freezing cold, they’re wearing a cocktail dress and they’ve lost their jacket and their purse

–         It’s too far, too dangerous and too cold for them to walk home

–         And without money or a card they can’t pay for a taxi so they are asking you for a ride – no one else is returning their calls

–         It’s a bit of an inconvenience for you but you are a kind hearted person

–         What’s more you couldn’t live with yourself if you did nothing and some harm came to them

–         So you put on some clothes, get in your car, drive to where they are and take them home

 

That is an act of hesed – a simple act of kindness or mercy

–         Getting them to a warm & safe place is essential to their well-being

–         Under the circumstances there is no one else available to help them

–         And you have an existing relationship with them

 

Okay, that’s a relatively small act of hesed – now a more significant or demanding example…

 

Imagine a good friend of yours gets sick and they need a kidney transplant but no donor can be found

–         You care for your friend deeply and want to help them

–         So you go and get yourself checked out to see if you are a match and as providence would have it you are

–         You donate one of your kidney’s to your friend and they live

 

That is an act of hesed – but the meaning of hesed in that situation goes beyond simple kindness – it is really a sacrificial act of mercy & loyal love

–         The action of donating a kidney is essential to your friend’s basic survival

–         It is something that, under the circumstances, only you can do

–         And it’s done in the context of an existing relationship with your friend

 

Another example…

–         This time imagine a slightly different scenario with your good friend

–         Imagine they are sick but there is nothing the doctors can do for them

–         Your friend is going to die and, because your friend has no family members able to do it, she asks you to take care of her 2 year child

–         So you agree to adopt the child and raise her as your own

 

That is an act of hesed – an act which demonstrates both kindness & loyal love

–         Although you can’t save your friend’s life you are still doing something huge for their well-being (and the well-being of their child)

–         You are giving them peace of mind in their last days by providing security for their daughter

–         No one else is going to love that child like you will – without you the child would most likely end up lost in the system

–         And you are doing this in the context of an existing positive relationship with your friend

 

Returning to Ruth & Naomi: by releasing her daughters-in-law Naomi is performing an act of hesed for them

–         It meets all three criteria

–         Her action in releasing them from further obligation is for their wellbeing

–         It is an action that only Naomi can perform – no one else can do it

–         And Naomi has an existing positive relationship with Ruth & Orpah

 

Orpah takes a bit of convincing but in the end she accepts Naomi’s advice and returns to Moab

–         Ruth, on the other hand, insists on staying with Naomi saying:

 

“Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried…”

 

Ruth commits herself to Naomi, to Naomi’s people and to Naomi’s God

–         And this commitment isn’t just until Naomi dies – it is until Ruth dies

–         Ruth will be buried where Naomi is buried

–         If you think about it Ruth was essentially saying goodbye to her family and her homeland for good

 

This was huge – Ruth was making this commitment at great risk to herself

–         She didn’t know whether Naomi’s people would accept her or not

–         Abraham, that great father of the faith, stepped out into the unknown but only after God called him and made a promise to him

–         Ruth’s faith was even greater than Abraham’s

–         Ruth steps out into the unknown without any word from God and what’s more she does so without the wealth and backing that Abram had

 

The apostle Paul writes in his letter to the Galatians:

–         The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love

–         Ruth takes a massive leap of faith out of her love for Naomi

 

Ruth knows that her own chances of survival are better if she returns to Moab but she also knows that Naomi’s chances of survival are better if she (Ruth) goes to Israel and takes care of Naomi

–         By releasing Ruth from further obligation, Naomi had performed hesed for her daughter-in-law

–         Ruth responds by going above and beyond, doing an even greater act of hesed for Naomi

–         Ruth is performing an action essential to Naomi’s well-being & survival

–         No one else is available to take care of Naomi – her husband and sons are dead and Orpah has gone back to Moab

–         Furthermore Ruth is doing this hesed in the context of an existing positive relationship with Naomi

–         Ruth’s hesed ticks all the boxes

 

What we note here is that both Naomi’s & Ruth’s acts of hesed are done freely and out of genuine love and concern for one another’s well-being – not out of grudging duty or obligation

 

When Naomi returns to Bethlehem (her home town) she is greeted by the people there but she says to them:

–         “Don’t call me Naomi (which means sweetness), call me Mara (which means bitterness) because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. I went away full but the Lord has brought me back empty…”

 

Naomi has been emptied by her loss

–         She has nothing to show for her life and nothing to look forward to

–         She is alive physically but (inside) her sense of hope has died

 

One of the things that young people can give us is hope – a sense that life doesn’t end with us (that the future holds something good)

–         The young don’t usually realise they are doing this though

–         By the same token those of us who are older may also miss the hope the young have to offer

 

Ruth embodies hope, only Naomi can’t see it straight away – she is blinded by her grief

–         But nor does Ruth realise it – she is simply getting on with it, making sure they don’t starve

 

Ruth 3 – Ruth & Boaz’ Hesed:

Ruth goes out to glean in the fields – picking up the left-overs after the harvesters have been through – and in the process she meets Boaz, a wealthy and influential citizen of Bethlehem

–         As providence would have it Boaz is a good match for Ruth – by which I mean he is related to Naomi’s late husband, he is able to provide for Ruth and they seem to like each other

–         When Naomi hears of Boaz her hope (embodied by Ruth) is kindled

 

After some months have passed Naomi comes up with a plan to find some security for them both by getting Boaz to marry Ruth

–         Not only would this provide Ruth & Naomi with financial security and protection, it could also provide an heir for Ruth’s late husband

 

You see the Law of Moses provided for widows through something called levirate marriage [2]

–         ‘The levirate law provided that when a man died without children, his brother should marry the widow and have a child by her to preserve the lineage of the man who had died.’ [3]

–         Keeping the family line going was a really big deal in ancient culture

 

Under normal circumstances Naomi might approach Boaz herself and ask if he would help them out by marrying Ruth (sort of like an arranged marriage), but these weren’t normal circumstances

–         Ruth was a Moabite – a foreigner

–         Furthermore, Boaz wasn’t Ruth’s brother-in-law, although he was a near relative of Naomi’s late husband

–         So the law of levirate marriage was not an exact fit in this situation

–         If Naomi approached Boaz he might easily say ‘no’

–         But if Ruth dolled herself up and got close to him at night, well he might find it more difficult to say ‘no’.

 

Naomi said to Ruth…

–         “Wash and perfume yourself and put on your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don’t let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. When he lies down… go and uncover his feet and lie down too. He will tell you what to do.”

 

It was a risky plan

–         What if Ruth was seen by someone else, sneaking into bed with Boaz?

–         What if Boaz took advantage of Ruth? (Everyone would believe Boaz – no one would believe Ruth)

–         Or what if he thought she was a bit loose and rejected her?

–         Ruth was putting her reputation on the line in a culture where reputation was everything

–         But that’s one of the great things about young people – they are often more ready to take risks than those of us who are older and feel like we have something to lose

 

Ruth does what Naomi says – well, sort of

–         She gets under the blankets with Boaz while he is asleep

–         There is no hanky panky but when he wakes up in the middle of the night to find another person there he doesn’t tell her what to do

–         He is startled – it is dark and he can’t see, so he asks a question…

–         “Who are you?”  To which Ruth replies…

 

“I am your servant Ruth. Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a kinsman-redeemer”

 

This is a poetic way of saying ‘marry me’

–         Ruth doesn’t wait for Boaz to tell her what to do – she tells Boaz what she wants

–         Some men might be put off by that sort of forthrightness but not Boaz

–         He responds positively to Ruth saying…

 

“The Lord bless you, my daughter. This kindness [this hesed] is greater than that which you showed earlier: You have not run after the younger men, whether rich or poor…”

 

There’s that word, hesed, again

–         Ruth’s first act of hesed was to promise to go with Naomi wherever she might go – to be Naomi’s companion till the end of her days

–         Now Ruth’s second act of hesed is to marry within the family

 

In thinking of the three criteria for hesed…

–         Ruth is doing something essential for the well-being of others – seeking an heir for her late husband and a grandson for Naomi

–         This is something no one else can do – Naomi has no other children

–         And it is done in the context of existing relationships

 

If Ruth had gone after a younger man who wasn’t related to Naomi, then Ruth’s first born would not be considered Naomi’s grandchild, nor would he carry on her late husband’s name (and as I’ve already mentioned, carrying on the family line was massive in ancient Hebrew culture)

 

Boaz is impressed by Ruth’s noble character – he loves her hesed

–         And, after a little plot twist, he reciprocates the hesed by redeeming Naomi’s land and marrying Ruth. Ruth gave birth to a son, Obed.

–         Obed became the father of Jesse and Jesse the father of king David

–         This really is an intergenerational story where people of all ages are valued and cared for – each with a vital role to play

 

Conclusion:

Ruth & Naomi provide an ideal to inspire our own intergenerational relationships

–         I’m not saying we all need to make the same level of commitment as Ruth did with Naomi – but we do well to look for opportunities to demonstrate hesed where it is in our power to do so

 

In Micah 6, verse 8 – the passage of Scripture we looked at last week – the prophet says:

–         And what does the Lord require of you? To do justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

–         The original Hebrew word, translated there as ‘mercy’, is actually hesed

–         So the Lord God Almighty requires us to love hesed

–         That is to enjoy performing acts of hesed, when it is in our power to do so, and to value or cherish the acts of hesed we witness or receive

–         Together Ruth, Naomi and Boaz show us what it means to ‘love hesed’

 

Some times our acts of hesed will be relatively small, like picking someone up in town in the middle of the night

–         Other times we may be asked to consider a far bigger act of hesed – one which can only be done once and can’t be repeated

–         If you donate a kidney to your friend you can’t donate one to anyone else

–         Likewise, Ruth’s hesed for Naomi prevented her from taking care of her own parents (presumably there were others in Ruth’s family who could do that)

 

My intention here is not to load you up with some impossible burden

–         It is not always in our power to do hesed – no matter how much we may want to

–         If you are not a match then you can’t donate your kidney to save your friend

–         What you can do though is walk with your friend through the process – be their companion so they don’t have to go through it alone

 

Who can you do hesed for – whether younger or older?

–         Who can you companion – through good times and bad?

 

[Jesus performed acts of hesed (kindness, mercy & loyal love) throughout his ministry as he healed the sick and forgave the guilty and delivered people from evil. His ultimate act of hesed though we remember now in the breaking of bread and the sharing of the cup. Through his death on the cross Jesus did something for us that no one else could do – he reconciled us to God…]

 

https://soundcloud.com/tawabaptist/2-july-2017-naomi-ruth

[1] Katherine Doob-Sakenfeld, Ruth, page 24

[2] Deuteronomy 25:5-10

[3] Katherine Sakenfeld, ‘Just Wives’, page 36.